Eclectic Optimist

How to eat a banana...

2009-03-28T17:29:00.010-06:00

Here's one way to eat a banana.

My little guy gets his hair cut

2009-03-28T17:11:00.005-06:00

Today, we went to Beaners to get Tristan's first hair cut. At first I thought, he'd be able to sit in a "tractor" or "motorcycle" chair, but because he is still so little, they suggested he try a high chair with a steering wheel. Well, the little guy didn't want any of it. He tried to crawl out the minute he sat in the chair, so Mommy had to hold him, while the stylist quickly and professionally snipped away.

Mr. Squirmy Wormy didn't want to sit long, so I was grateful that it didn't take long for him to get a more polished look. It's amazing how much he looks like a little boy now... I guess he's growing up.

Life as a Mom of a One Year Old

2009-03-27T16:22:00.006-06:00

"It's not fair," the Mommy pouts. "Now that he's becoming his own little person, I have to be back at work!"

It's true... After one incredible year of being a Mommy to little Tristan, it's hard to go back to work. Not because I don't love work; I really love working. But because he is so amazing, and I wish I could spend every minute learning more about him.

We've had a terrific year just getting to know each other. With our visits to the zoo, Bragg Creek, the play room, Banff, Canmore and various places around town, things have certainly been busy. But it was worth it. Tristan is a wonderful little guy - curious, charming, giving (he always wants to share his food - LOL), funny, smart and adventurous. I am so lucky to have him as my baby.

Being a Mom and an almost wife has put a different perspective on things. Someone asked me earlier today what I envisioned for myself within the next three or four years, and I responded that I wanted to be happy and enjoy my family. Just being with Tristan and his Daddy - even on a bad day - makes me happy. Yes, you can groan at my sentimentality. If you would have asked me the question 10 years ago, I probably would have said something more career focused. It's amazing how things change.

Being a Mommy has also made me appreciate my friends more, even though I haven't been able to see as much of them lately. I'm very grateful to have such supportive friends. When things are tough - they're always there. I'm just lucky in general, I guess.

Our Baby is Six Months Old

2008-09-13T06:03:00.004-06:00

I can't believe it! My little boy is now six months old! Not to be cliche or anything (LOL), I'm amazed at how big he's getting and at how much he's learned (and will learn). And, as much as I'd like to capture the moments, they seem to just fly by.

When he was born, he weighed 8 pounds, 10 ounces and measured 20 inches long. Now, he's 17 pounds, four ounces and 27 inches long! How did that happen?

Tristan is a happy baby, who loves to sing when he wakes up in the morning. He giggles when you pretend to be surprised or nibble on his knee or make a funny noise, and babbles, saying baba and ball. He enjoys rice cereal - not the whole grain organic kind, just plain rice cereal - and needs to be coaxed to eat vegetables (just like last year when he was still in my tummy).

The little guy has been perfecting his munching skills - nibbling on everything he can get his little hands on (don't leave paper or magazines within his grasp!). He hasn't started to crawl yet, but that doesn't mean he isn't mobile. He just pushes around on his belly. Thank goodness for the excer-saucer - at least he can't get into too much trouble playing in that.

As far as adventures go, he likes to be outside. He's been to Heritage Park six or seven times, and the zoo over 15. He loves spending time with his extended family - bio and honorary ones. He also loves playing with his cousins - Gabby, Marlon, Elecsia and J.J., watching the traffic go by from the window, visiting the mountains, and just exploring his surroundings. He doesn't have a favourite toy just yet, but seems to have a fondness for books and things that move, like cars and trains.

For the last month or so, we've been going to the pool near our house. During the first few visits, he seemed to study everything around him - concentrating on the experience. Now he's starting to enjoy the pool more, especially now that he has swimming classes and can flirt with some little girls around his age.

What does Tristan love most of all? He loves to hang out with his Dad. Together they do all sorts of things, like play games on the floor, tell each other stories, assemble benches, and even pick crab apples. They're a busy duo, and considering they look like twins, it's lots of fun to watch.

We're very lucky to have our little guy. Happy six months Tristan!

My Little Guy is now Six Months old

2008-09-13T05:55:00.001-06:00

Tristan is now six months old. I can't believe how fast he's grown

The food lust... I mean list

2008-08-23T06:56:00.002-06:00

It’s been so long that I’ve been a regular in the blogging world, that I decided to borrow one of those lists (thanks Kati). This time it’s about food (darn this post-baby weight)… The rules are simple…

To participate, you must:
1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating. (I couldn't figure out how to do it, so I put an 'x' beside these ones)
4) My Optional extra: Italizie any you would like to try

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred:
1. Venison (nummy, thankfully my man hunts bambi)
2. Nettle tea as well as nettle cheese
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile (the first time I tried it was just before going to see the first Jurassic Park with my friend Bobby)
6. Black pudding aka blood sausage aka veres hurka
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp (really gross, but I’ve tried it)
9. Borscht (my mom-in-law makes the best!)
10. Baba ghanoush (tasty and good for you)
11. Calamari
12. Pho (best Pho in Calgary is in a crowded diner-style restaurant in Chinatown)
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi (mmmm…)
15. Hot dog from a street cart (I miss New York)
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns (one of my favs)
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras (LOVE the stuff… Haven’t had it since my delightful dinner at the Eden Room in Banff about a year ago)
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters (couldn’t get enough of them when I was pregnant)
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda (sounds pretty good…)
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar (about a million years ago)
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects only if the ones swallowed while camping or bike riding count!
43. Phaal (maybe one day)
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer (I always like to experiment with cheese)
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal (don’t like to admit it though)
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin more than likely since is supposedly found in some medications and toothpaste
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette - X
71. Gazpacho (always reminds me of Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown)
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill - X
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie - X
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum (there’s a reason for the Yum! YUMMY!)
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse - X
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam - X
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake (actually, it was rattlesnake; tasted like chicken)

Reading this '100 List', I came to the realisation that there's so much more food to try. In my next life, I might have to be come a chef... or a food critic.

A word to the wise...

2008-08-23T06:16:00.003-06:00

...from the not so wise.

Never start making coffee before 6:00 am. Always get your coffee maker ready to go the night before you want it, or else you may just have coffee grinds all over the floor...

This is what happens when the boy lets me sleep a full night. I become too awake to sleep (if that makes sense).

It's been almost a year since my last update...

2008-06-25T07:11:00.004-06:00

And a lot has happened.

The most important change since my last blog entry is that I've become a Mom. Little Tristan was born weighing 8lbs 10oz. Of all of the things I've done in my life, he's by far the best.

So, what's he like? Well, he likes to study things; he tends to stare and ponder the world around him. He has an incredibly contagious smile. He loves kisses and hugs. Tristan is definitely his father's son... he's all Dad and doesn't look a thing like me. My little guy loves adventures - especially trips to the zoo. It's such a gift to watch him grow.

What else? I'm now engaged to the love of my life, Stuart. He is a kind and loving man, and a truly wonderful Dad. We haven't set a date yet, as we're working on our home in Calgary.

Our Calgary home renovations hit a few snags, so we're not quite there yet. We have all of our appliances, windows, exterior doors and kitchen cabinets ready to go... we just need our permits to continue the work. But, once it's ready, it will be comfortable. As long as Stu, Tristan and I are together - where ever we are is home.

That's it for now... More soon...

A man and an elephant

2007-06-06T21:36:00.000-06:00

A work colleague sent me the following story. Enjoy.

This story may bring a little tear to your eye.
You have got to love it when there is such a
wonderful story of compassion and truth.

In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on a holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Mbembe worked the wood out with his hunting knife. Afterwards the elephant gingerly put down it's foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on it's face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away.

Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day. Twenty years later, Mbembe was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his son, Tapu, were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe, lifted it's front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped it's trunk around one of Mbembe's legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

Never a dull moment...

2007-05-30T21:33:00.000-06:00

Yes. It’s been forever since I last updated my blog. It’s not that my life hasn’t been eventful. Maybe it’s been too eventful. Between my personal adventures and work, life has been a whirlwind.

Here are some of the highlights:

My Mom, sister and I had dinner at the Eden Room at the Rimrock Hotel in Banff. The meal was eight courses, and we had exceptional service (you couldn’t go to the bathroom without being escorted, and a fresh serviette draped on your lap upon your return). The dinner was a part of a Mother’s Day/Christmas gift from my brother to my Mom, and a ‘Congratulations on your PhD’ for my sister. It was neat hearing the wait-staff refer to my sister as ‘Doctor’. We stayed at a fabulous suit in Canmore, with a fireplace, heated tiles in the bathroom, stereo, BBQ – you name it. Even a view. Definitely a memorable weekend.

I had brunch with my dear friends at Moxies, where we had a chance to catch-up a bit after their trip to Hungary. I have to laugh. My girlfriend is WAY too easy to shop for. I think I have her gifts for the next several years.

I bit the bullet and got a Blackberry for work. Dangerous, given my work-a-holic tendencies.

Stuart and I went to Winnipeg for a few days. Me on business, and him to visit family and explore his birthplace. I met a few of his relatives (really nice folks), and spent some time with work colleagues. We stayed at the Fort Garry, and indulged in room service and their buffet breakfast. We even went to Sugar Mountain for candy treats that we hadn’t even thought of in years (and spent WAY too much money).

Had a terrific Saturday where I met my Godchildren and their Mom for breakfast, met one of my bestest friends and a friend for tea/coffee, and introduced my beautiful niece to all of them. That day, I also went shopping went shopping with my sister-in-law and niece. Gabby was very good, and not fussy at all, but I know she’ll follow in her aunt’s footsteps and become a skilled shopper.

Hung out with Gabby, and sang her all sorts of songs. She makes me smile.

Found THE perfect engagement ring… or Stuart’s Mom said it was the perfect engagement ring. Actually, Stu’s Mom and I went shopping and ‘accidentally’ looked at rings, where I spotted the ultimate ring… Simple, elegant and tanzanite with no visible inclusions – and well-priced for what it was (I tried on a similar ring at Birks that cost over twice as much). Stuart’s Mom made sure that Stuart and her husband knew all about the ring and how amazing it was. I almost bought it for myself, as I wouldn’t expect Stuart to pay so much for a ring. I had to talk myself down, though. Ring v.s. basement renovations… Darn. I had to be practical and pick the basement.

Oh yeah… My basement flooded. The water table in town is fairly high, and my basement ended up flooding. I’m grateful for my insurance company who helped remove all of the stuff from the basement, and suction out all of the excess water. Stuart is my miracle though. He came over the same day, installed a new sump-pump, and he helped me get things organized. I have to keep this boy.

After experiencing significant migraines over the last couple of months, I finally saw my neurologist. We talked for a while and reviewed my options. He basically gave me two choices with respect to treatment – a rock and hard place. I chose the rock, no… the hard place… I think I chose the more difficult of the options, but I know in my heart of hearts that my decision was the right one.

My Mom, sister, and I went to Banff on Easter Sunday, and we got into our usual trouble… We’re not allowed near jewelry or bath product stores. ‘Nuff said.

I went to a few parties – one for Stu’s Dad, the other for his good friend. Each of the parties were memorable. (And, BTW, I spent part of Mother’s Day and Easter with Stu’s family – also fun.)

Spent too much time and money at IKEA to redecorate my home.

Explored central Alberta with Stuart, and went places we had never gone before.

I’m sure I forgot a few things, but I guess these were some of the highlights. Good things are on the agenda for the next few weeks… that’s if all goes to plan.

Stu’s birthday! I still have no idea what to get for him. Girls are so much easier to shop for.

A wedding of an old and dear friend. She’s marrying her soul mate, and I’m so excited for her.

A spa date with one of my bestest friends, then lunch, and a trip to Holt Renfrew.

My sister’s convocation!

A trip to Victoria to see the Titanic Exhibition. I can hardly wait!

My little guy’s fifth birthday… We’re going to Build a Bear, so he can make a special stuffed animal.

A Whole New World... A New Fantastic Point of View

2007-04-02T21:05:00.000-06:00

Here is a graphic from my favourite Disney film, Aladdin. Aladdin is a diamond in the rough, who strives to overcome his humble beginnings, and Jasmine is the princess that wants to experience the world beyond her castle walls and to create her own rules. Together, they work towards making the world a better place. And, they do, while living happily ever after. How magical is that!

It's easy to understand why I consider this film a classic!

Be careful about your thoughts

2007-03-28T21:43:00.000-06:00

I woke up this morning, and started to get ready for work. It was 'casual' day, which means I put on jeans and a Tommy shirt. When I glanced in the mirror, after applying my makeup and putting my hair in a pony tail, I shrugged at how awful I looked.

I'm well overdue for a hair cut and colour (I've been planning one for weeks, but haven't been able to get away), and I even noticed a new grey hair! Yipes. My hair was kinda kinky, but the pony tail helped tame it a bit.

All I could think, as I saw myself in the mirror was, "Thank goodness, I don't have to do an on-camera interview today."

Famous last words, right?

My work day was quite hectic, as always, and while I was on the phone, THE call came through. "Hi, I'm [well-known and respected TV guy], and we were wondering if we could interview you for a story that we're picking up nationally. We'd like to send a camera crew to interview you."

Fine... My jaw dropped to the floor.

As I've said before... I've got the face for radio, and the voice for print.

I talk to the media all the time - in fact, when TV Guy left me the voicemail message, a Corporate VIP called to give his kudos on a story that printed in a major paper in his province. But if I'm on TV, I usually have a bit of a head's up, so I don't look like something the cat dragged it. And, to be on national TV... I had to do something... and quick. Between media calls and chairing our weekly national teleconference, I had to dash home and change.

I started frantically calling my family - to give them a heads up (they get mad at me if I don't) - as I quickly took a shower and tore apart my closet looking for something to wear. Of course, like all women, I decided that I own no clothes... I finally decided on a white lacy top and a black skirt and jacket, accented with a vintage silver pin. Professional. Simple. And, a hint of flare...

Time was ticking... I applied my makeup and cringed at my ignored hair. When I got to the office, I convinced my ever so talented Administrative Assistant to style my hair... I'm so grateful to her. She put it into a french braid, and made me look polished.

The TV crew arrived, and the interview went well. The cameraman and interviewer were laid back, and despite the frantic pre-interview moments, I was relaxed and enjoyed doing the on and off camera discussions.

Unfortunately, I was told that the story got bumped from the national broadcast, as there were others that had greater priority, but I did make the local news.

I was at work when the story aired, but my Mom, sister, brother, sister-in-law and Gabby all watched the news and cheered me on at my Mom's house.

By the time I got home, my Mom had left a message - first complimenting my hair, then indicating that she was proud of me for doing a good job. I called home, and she gushed praise like all Moms do. I needed a P.R. perspective, so I spoke with my sister-in-law, who also manages a Communications Department, and my ever charming brother, who works for a national TV affiliate (different from the one I was to appear on), and they both were impressed.

Whew! All in a days work.

Gabby... my beautiful niece

2007-03-26T23:55:00.000-06:00

Welcome to the all about Gabby entry. My little niece is way too cool...

Of course, she takes after her parents. Les and Suz, my brother and sister-in-law, are amazing parents, who admire all of her quirks, smiles and cries. I'm so proud of them.

The funny thing is that I remember how much Les aspired to be a Dad - even when he was very young. Les admired our Dad and would try to emulate him... from morning rituals like shaving, drinking 'coffee' (which was really warm milk with a couple of instant coffee granules in it), and reading the paper to 'helping' with projects in the basement. Les could hardly wait to be a Dad too, so he could carry his children on his shoulders as they explored the mountains, a zoo, a national park, the beauty of every day life together. And, now my baby brother will be able to live his dreams.

And, Suzanne, my beautiful sister-in-law, and I would always talk about what she and Les would be like as parents. This is before little Gabby was even a glimmer in her eye. We knew that if they had a daughter, that she'd be wearing frilly panties, white tights, black patent shoes and ribbons or accessories in her hair. That's when she wasn't wearing super hero or fairy princess costumes - of course.

I'm looking forward to seeing how little Gabby grows, and discovering who she becomes. I know she is a lucky little girl, and that she will grow up surrounded by love, understanding and adoration.

Here are some recent photos of my little angel. More to come...

Be Thankful for Your Good Days...

2007-03-26T22:27:00.000-06:00

I picked today's picture because I was ridiculously happy that day in the Dominican Republic, and I had many reasons to smile... Just like today.

After spending a week fighting migraines, I woke up this morning and didn't feel awful. I was so happy that I wasn't blinded by dots of light, and plagued with the headaches, weakness, nausea, and other lovely symptoms resulting from migraines.

Even though today was a busy media day, and my phone at work was ringing non-stop, I can't complain - I can even smile. I was grateful to be able to get through the day and not feel compromised by feeling ill.

It's funny. I guess a few 'bad health' days makes me appreciate the days that I do feel good. So, yes... even feeling yucky serves a purpose. It makes the good days even better.

I Feel Incredibly Lucky

2007-03-14T22:14:00.000-06:00

The other day as Stu and I were cuddling, a stupid smile grew on my face. “What?” he asked, “What are you smiling about?”

I told him that I was incredibly lucky. He asked if I had won the lottery or something. I said no… I feel amazingly lucky because he’s with me.

(Try not to gag… I know that may be a bit too much girly goo for some of my loyal readers… But it’s absolutely true.)

As you know I had an amazing week in the Dominican Republic with Stu. Just glancing at the photos makes me smile.

Then, more good luck/news. Shortly after we got back, my baby brother and sister-in-law had their first baby – little Gabrielle Marie (aka Gabby). She is funny and sweet and has my Dad’s lips. Her cry is endearing, and I swear she’s learned to smile already. I am so excited about watching her grow up.

Here is a photo of my little girl. I told you she was cute! Now you know why I'm so lucky.

Trip to the Dominican Republic

2007-03-08T06:21:00.000-07:00

Sorry, it's taken so long to update the blog. It's been a whirlwind since I returned home.

Stu (aka SiR - he's okayed me using his name on the blog) and I had an amazing trip.

We ate weigh too much (yes... the weigh was intentional - I think they're going to kick me out of Weight Watchers). We embraced our inner beach-bum, enjoying sea kayaking, swimming in the ocean and walking on the shore. It was wonderful to feel the sand melt away beneath our feet as the ocean waves rolled onto the beach.

Shopping was also on the agenda, and I'm pretty sure that the beach vendors found my bargaining skills annoying (when they couldn't get anywhere with me, they looked to Stu for guidance; they didn't get far). We also took two tours - one snorkeling tour on a catamaran, the other a safari ride through the country-side.

We have a million stories, including a few "girly goo/I've got the best boyfriend ever" ones that might not get posted for fear of giving Stu an inflated ego (he might think I actually LIKE him...)

It was definitely one of the best vacations I've ever taken, and truth be told, one of the best weeks of my life. And, yes... I do like Stu, and he is the best boyfriend ever.

Whew! What a day!

2007-02-12T16:11:00.000-07:00

Murphy's Law of the day before flying away... things don't always turn out the way you plan - at least not at first.

I spent the entire morning waiting for a courier package from Saskatoon that was supposed to arrive no later than 12:00 pm. So, I didn't pack, bathe, get American currency etc, for fear that I would miss this package for work. Finally, at 1:00 pm, I decided to call the printer to see if I could have the parcel traced. Thank goodness I did... I learned that the parcel was sent to my office, and not to my Mom's house. Had I waited any longer, I might not have been able to get a few errands done.

I finally bathed and got my life together enough to go to the bank and get money (whew!).

Of course, I also ended up in the Medical Clinic near my Mom's house because I did something really stupid last night, which resulted in the need for some assistance. (It didn't seem bad at first, and Mom and my sister were helpful. But, when I called Healthlink earlier today, they advised that I get treatment because it was more serious than I thought.) When I had to explain what had happened, the medical assistant burst out laughing... exactly what I did when I realised my booboo created a bad owie... A really ugly owie in a prominent place (thank goodness I'm not overly vain, otherwise I think I'd be crying instead of chuckling right now). The doctor suppressed her laughter and provided a prescription and advice to help minimise my injury, saying that I might even see improvement before I get on the plane. I'm happy to say that I should be on the mend soon.

After the appointment, I got to my car, and the lady in the car parked beside me rolled her window down, and said something really nice... She brushed the snow off the back window of my car - improving my day considerably.

And, my day keeps getting better and better... I spoke with my kid brother a short while ago to see how their doctor's appointment went. My sister-in-law was getting her last ultra sound before their baby is born. Pippy, as they've nicknamed the little one, is a good weight - just shy of 8 pounds. With just two weeks to go, it looks like the baby will be around 8 pounds, or just a little over. And, my bro told me the baby's gender. I immediately started to cry. I guess I would have cried regardless of what he said. I can't spoil the surprise for anyone, but all I can say is that I'm so thrilled that the baby and Mom are healthy, and that I get to meet this special person very soon.

Now, I guess I have to start packing before Mom gets home from work and discovers the disaster area that was once her living room.

One more sleep, and I'll be off on an amazing adventure with SiR.

Two more sleeps

2007-02-11T21:49:00.000-07:00

I can hardly wait for SiR and I to go on our trip. It's been snowy and a little cold here in Calgary, making it that much more sweet that we're heading off this week. I know we're going to have a happy adventure...

Five more sleeps until the Dominican Republic!

2007-02-09T02:41:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow’s my last day at work before my holidays, and I can hardly wait.

I still have three critical things to do, but once they’re done, I can leave guilt-free. Well, almost guilt-free. There are always so many things to get done, but I figure whatever I get done, I’ll get done, and whatever I don’t can wait for my return. I just need to let go a bit.

And, when reflecting on the amount of time I’ve taken off since my vacation with Mom, I don’t think I’ve taken more than two consecutive days off that weren’t actual holidays. With all of the work we’ve been doing, I know my break is definitely earned.

I’m so happy and excited to have a week with my guy – to lounge in the sun and share an adventure together. Just thinking about it makes me smile.

I haven’t finished his Valentine’s Day gift yet. I might have to recruit my sister-in-law to help me. One more thing on my to do list… but it’s a happy thing to be working on.

A week today, we’ll be flying away…

2007-02-06T07:23:00.000-07:00

Exactly one week today, SiR and I will be on a plane, flying off to the Dominican Republic. I can hardly wait for the adventure to start.

SiR came by on Thursday night, and we spent much of the weekend together. It was so nice to have him here.

On Thursday, after awaking me from a nap with a kiss, SiR and I went to our favourite Greek restaurant in town, where one of the owners came by, sat with us and chatted. Then Angel joined us for a short time.

Friday meant a trip to Edmonton for SiR, and a hectic day at work for me, preparing for an upcoming product release. We met at home, where he brought me flowers and brought him fudge – coincidently from the same store. We then bought groceries and roasted a chicken. It was delicious. (SiR gave me a hint about my Valentine’s Day gift… I’m way too excited).

We slept in on Saturday morning, and I couldn’t help but smile as he started to get ready for breakfast. I told him that the morning started off in my favourite way. He looked confused. “But we didn’t do anything.” I said, “I woke up beside you, jerk.” If I had something handy to throw at him, I would have… but alas my there was nothing close by. He laughed, and we went for breakfast at Smitty’s.

We bumped into a couple that I’ve known for a few years. It was nice to see them. Then SiR and I wandered through the streets of small town Alberta and shopped a bit. We returned home and were lazy, watching movies and eating.

SiR was supposed to return to Calgary on Saturday night, so he could go skiing with his family. He ended up spending the night, and we woke up ridiculously early, so he could start his journey home. I was so tired, that I spent the rest of the weekend napping.

Seven Weird Things About Me...

2007-02-05T20:08:00.000-07:00

One of our fellow-bloggers posted six weird things about herself on her website, and being a bit of a cheater, I decided to add a few weird things about me…

1) Although my Dad passed away three and a half years ago, I still talk to him everyday, and ask his advice on things. I believe that he hears me and takes care of me, just like he did when he was alive.
2) My TV tends to be on a lot – not because I pay attention to it – but because I like having noise when I work. For some reason, a bit of background noise helps me work better (except when I need to concentrate – see next bullet)
3) If I’m suffering from writer’s block, I tend to write things out with a freshly sharpened pencil… at least to start with… until my thoughts are focused. Of course, this is in a super quiet environment (which seems to contradict the previous bullet)
4) Whenever I need to resolve an issue, I’ll think about it, then take a bath. For some reason, the answer tends to come to me in the tub. (When I was in university, I would study my books, then take a bath to let my studies sink in… must have worked…).
5) The type of book I read in my leisure reflects the amount of stress I’m under at work. If I’m reading something academic, then my stress levels (or the level of concentration required at work) are fairly low; if I’m reading pulp fiction, then my stress levels, or need to concentrate at work, is fairly high.
6) I’m an introvert that has to force herself to be more of an extrovert in unfamiliar social situations and work environments.
7) I’m on the phone at work all the time, so I tend to turn my ringer off at night.

My life as a Circus Freak

2007-01-30T19:27:00.000-07:00

I'm juggling too many balls in the air – terrified that one will drop along the way.

I’m flitting about at work, preparing for two product launches, and a full equipment replacement. This is while training new staff, working on special projects, participating in research, and of course, all the other “boss” type stuff I do on a regular basis. And, of course, because I liaise with so many people and sit on so many committees, my phone doesn’t usually stop ringing, and I’m often pulled into meetings. This means long days that don’t end at 4:30, or even when I get home (can you tell I’m procrastinating right now).

Then, it’s my home life… between trying to clean (insert laugh track here – I must hire a housekeeper again), eat “real” food (i.e. not processed, delivered or take out), keep on top of laundry, do my volunteer work, not get kicked out of Weight Watchers, and prepare for my trip… And, this doesn’t include trying to keep in touch with family and friends… (sorry for neglecting you guys), fighting migraines originating from weather changes, and working on SiR’s homemade Valentine’s gift (sorry sweetie, I haven’t even started it).

Right now, I think that I’d be stressed if it wasn’t for my trip to the Dominican… I can hardly wait to spend an entire week with SiR, frolicking in the sun. I’m looking forward to escaping from everyday life with him. My bikinis still fit… But I hope they still look okay on me.

Sigh… in exactly two weeks and at this precise moment, SiR and I will be at the resort – likely exploring our surroundings and soaking in the magic of a new adventure.

Stayed home from work today

2007-01-23T16:30:00.000-07:00

My migraines are back... I think it's particially due to hormones, the weather change, and maybe sinuses. Frustrating. There's so much to do at work and in my messy house, and a migraine is the last thing I need.

And, to top it all off, my tummy still hurts from this weekend, and I just want to feel better.

Even my dreams reflect my weirdness. I dreamt that I was walking down the block near where my Mom lives, and that my EX and his Mom (yes, unless something has changed, he still lives with his Mom) lived in a mansion on the same street. I said hi to his Mom (his Mom is terrific), and she said that that EX had a new girlfriend named Susan. I felt such relief that he'd finally moved on and found happiness with someone else. Oddly, this all occured at night and the sky was filled with pretty stars and some UFOs (yup... I said I had weird dreams).

My head is pounding more now, and I've had to edit my words several times because they didn't make sense when I wrote them, so I'll log off for now. (And maybe stop complaining...)

Another Weekend with SiR

2007-01-22T20:30:00.000-07:00

As you know from my previous post, SiR spent the weekend with me in small town Alberta. Despite eating way too much and experiencing brutal stomach cramps (thank goodness for Tylenol - and lots of it!), it was a nice weekend.

SiR amazes me with his patience, kindness and sense of humour. I loved the fact that we didn't have to do much of anything to enjoy each other's company. I'm perfectly content just cuddling with him, enjoying a movie or TV show, reading articles, laughing at silly things, eating and cooking with him (hmmm... bacon), and just being (even with a brutal tummy ache).

We did go to Drum. I love it there so much, and it was nice to share some of my haunts with with him. We went to the museum and to some of my favourite shops (including IGA...). When we got home, we made a dinner of pork chops, Caesar salad(he made it, and it was so good), glazed carrots, and garlic mashed potatoes. Then we watched Bollywood Hollywood, and took it easy.

Sunday was a day of eating and sloth... Can't complain though. It was nice to spend quiet time together. We watched one of my favourite movies - Casablanca - and I fell in love with the movie all over again.

Today, SiR and I went to the local Health clinic to get shots for our upcoming trip. It felt weird and somewhat natural at the same time to share a doctor's appointment with him. (Thank goodness he knows about my medical conditions... I don't think there were any surprises there)...

We then went for lunch at Zorba's... hmmm nummy... and good conversation as always. When he noticed I signed the credit card bill, SiR asked something kinda funny... He asked if I practiced signing my name using his last name. I never really answered the question... But I did tell him that I'd already told him that I'd take his last name if we ever married...

I made poor SiR tour my office and meet some of my co-workers. They all thought he seemed really nice (and even one said he was handsome). Then, he had to go home...My house feels a bit empty without him here... But the fact that I worked until about 7:45 pm - again... makes it easier to come home to a house without SiR here.

It also feels weird knowing that he reads my blog... Not that I can keep secrets from him... It's just that I feel like I can't do all the glowy girl things that I was doing before... Don't want to make his head swell. (Or conversely, lament men... and their nature...not that I have any complaints about him - at least for the moment.) :-) So much for embracing my sarcastic nature...

Although I'm feeling a bit overworked today, I'm happy and content.

Lazy Saturday Morning...

2007-01-20T11:08:00.000-07:00

I love this kind of Saturday morning... SiR and I have slept in and "are craving bacon" (quoting the fuzzy - but not super fuzzy guy lying beside me). We slept in this morning, which was absolutely required.

I worked about 13 1/2 hours yesterday... between fielding media calls for a story and working on some statistical analysis, I was exhausted. When SiR arrived at my office yesterday at about 9:00, I was happy... Part one of my work was good enough to send to my boss, and I knew I could leave without having a guilty conscience over work. (Although I did dream about sorting spreadsheets last night... ARGH... so much for a restful/peaceful slumber...).

Whenever I field media calls, I always worry that my quotes will turn out a bit lame, so I have this sick/sad/pathetic/perverse/OCD habit of having to read what's in the paper/listen to myself on the radio and watch myself on TV. (I've long ago decided, however, that I have a voice for newsprint and a face for radio... hahaha!... I look like a balloon with hair whenever I'm on TV).

Of course, the first thing I did this morning, after kissing SiR on the cheek, was run down to grab my laptop to check out my quotes. Without doing an exhaustive search, I noticed the story appeared in two Calgary papers and the Toronto Sun... Not bad for a day's work...

SiR and I are still in bed, still craving crispy bacon and waffles... "Smitty's is in trouble" he says... Hmmmm BACON... We might head off for an adventure in Drumheller, depending on our LQ... laziness quotient.

The Date

2007-01-17T20:58:00.000-07:00

SiR and I decided to go on a date last Saturday night.

After helping my Mom with her plumbing, he went home, took a bath and got prettied up, and I did the same. We debated where to go for dinner, and settled on a restaurant that he used to frequent a short while ago.

The service was a little unusual, but the food was amazing, and as we were finishing our meal, one of the owners approached me and called me by name. It turns out that the new owners of this restaurant are a couple that I met a few years ago through work.

I was one of the hostesses at an event we were holding at a posh hotel in Quebec, and they were our guests. We had so much fun in Quebec and immediately bonded.

We lost touch over the years, and it was amazing to see them again. The lady, J, sat down with us for a short while and brought us up to date about her family's life, and asked about me and SiR. J was cute because she told SiR how wonderful I was, and was shocked that he had broken up with me... I jumped in and teased him about that as well. J insisted that we stay for sweets and an after dinner drink.

Afterwards, SiR and I went back to his Mom's placed and watched (or should I say, I slept through most of) the Wedding Crashers.

SiR and I had a fun date. I love spending time with him/

Passing notes in school

2007-01-17T20:53:00.000-07:00

On Friday, I realized that I got caught passing notes in school… Or, the blogger equivalent… SiR read my blog… All of it, and he knows everything I wrote, and some of the background for the rest. Definitely creating a new layer of honesty in our relationship.

I never kept the fact that I had a blog secret from SiR. In fact, he knew about the blog the first night we saw each other again. He also knew that I wrote about him; about our relationship. But, I didn’t share the address with him. And, he didn’t ask. It’s not that I wouldn’t have answered any question he asked truthfully.

Well, SiR is pretty smart. He used his keen investigative skills and figured out the address, and read it all. He confessed this to me on Friday night – after I told him I was feeling paranoid that we’d break up between Christmas and New Year’s.

Needless to say, I was mortified… By reading the blog, he learned all about my thoughts on our relationship. After the inital shock, play-hitting him a few times, and hiding under my pillow, I realised I was okay with it.

He told me that he found out the address just before Christmas, and I was shocked. Even though he knew everything I wrote about him, us and me, he wasn’t scared away. Most men would have been freaked out by the reference to marriage, or about the raw honesty in the blog. SiR said that he wasn’t – that the blog confirmed what he thought I was thinking.

The discussion about the blog created a new degree of honesty in our relationship, a new level of intimacy in our conversations. He told me a few other things that I didn’t know… Like the fact that his sister told him to either “piss or get off the pot” when it comes to me (she’s really smart); and that his Mom nudged him a week or two ago, saying “she’s the one”.

And, I told him - in no uncertain terms - that if it didn't work out this time, there would be no more... "Three strikes and you're out" I said.

I think we understand each other better now, and that we’re not as scared to talk about things that seem taboo when a couple first starts dating – like the thought of having kids.

We’re still having fun, and I look forward to seeing where our adventure takes us.

Egyptian Astrological Sign

2007-01-17T20:02:00.000-07:00

I noticed this on BFF and fellow blogger's website http://ourgoldfishbowl.blogspot.com/, and I thought I'd do it too.

Geb

Engaging personality, sensitive, modest, occasionally narcissistic, but can rise above vanity.
Colors: male: violet, female: rose
Compatible Signs:Set, Horus
Dates: Feb 12 - Feb 29, Aug 20 - Aug 31
Role: God of the earth
Appearance: Green-skinned man, with leaves all over his body and a goose on his head. Sometimes he was shown laying on his side under his wife, the sky goddess Nut.
Sacred animals: goose

What is Your Egyptian Zodiac Sign?
Designed by CyberWarlock of Warlock's Quizzles and Quandaries

Weather Change = Migraine

2007-01-08T16:07:00.000-07:00

Yipes! It's no longer as windy outside as it was earlier today, but my head is feeling it. Really.

Although I took it easy this weekend - rarely got out of bed because of my sinus headaches - my head is pounding, and I know that I'm on the verge of a migraine. Off to bed soon... I just wish I didn't suffer from migraines... They're awful, and sometimes the side-effects of the medications I take make me feel miserable.

I know... it could be worse. But right now, I just wish I didn't have to cope with this.

Windy...

2007-01-08T06:46:00.000-07:00

It's windy out there. In fact, very windy. According to the weather websites, the wind is hitting us at about 45 km. But, the fact that my house is shaking leads me to believe it is more than that.

Sigh... It's another Monday.

2007 is going to be a memorable year!

2007-01-05T20:59:00.000-07:00

Thus far, 2007 has been amazing. Even though I'm whining about a sinus cold/ headache/ exhaustion this week, I'm definitely walking on air.

New Year's Eve was spent with some of my favourite people. After I took FOREVER to get dressed in my black velvet dress from Le Chateau ($20!), SiR and I went to one of my BFF's place to pick up a few Christmas presents, say hi to my beautiful godchildren and iron his new shirt. My godchildren helped fix my hair - okay, my little four year old just scrunched my hair a bit, and my goddaughter offered fashion advice - but it was wonderful to see them. My BFF finally met SiR, and she gave him a thumbs up. We posed for pictures by her tree (believe it or not, SiR and I hadn't posed for any Christmas photos together up until that point). Then we exchanged happy wishes and hugs and SiR and I went to our New Year's event.

It was nice to arrive at the Hungarian Cultural Centre and immediately see another one of my BFF's. I can't describe how happy I felt to see her there. We saw her husband and father, and I knew I was at home.

Although my BFF, her family, and one of our fellow bloggers were busy ensuring a terrific event, SiR and I were lucky enough to be sitting with a couple whom I admire tremendously (fellow-blogger "Blissful Loser" and her husband). Her Mom, brother and sister-in-law were also there. Needless to write, I had excellent dinner companions. It was fun exploring Hungarian culture with SiR through the eyes of Blissful Loser's husband, and sharing laughs with the kind-hearted people at my table. I don't get a chance to see them very often, so I treasure the moments we share.

I took lots of pictures of the party, and I always laugh at the fact that all pictures I take with my BFF look like all the pictures we've taken together since high school (wow - that's 22 years now - can you believe it!). I guess I know why she's one of my BFF's, we always make each other smile, and we've always been honest with each other.

I'm so happy that I started 2007 kissing SiR, and that I was able to hug and kiss some of the people I treasure most in my life. I called my Mom, Grandmother, and brothers shortly after midnight to wish them a happy New Year.

I think SiR had a good time, and I'm so glad he was with me to ring in the New Year.
SiR and I slept in until about 11:00 - a rare luxury for me (and something I hope to do tomorrow). We then went to my Mom's and enjoyed lunch with my Mom, sister, brother, sister-in-law and their little baby to be.

SiR and I then went back to his place - with the intent of looking at travel destinations - but napped instead.

I then visited with a family I hadn't seen in forever. We looked through pictures, and had a wonderful time.

The drive home seemed to take FOREVER. I even called my Mom and SiR from the highway to make the journey less daunting. It was fairly late when I finally arrived home, so everything basically stayed where I left it... (I really need to clean my house - again).

The work week was tiring and the knowledge that there is a lot of work ahead of me seemed insurmountable. But SiR did something that made my week... that made every obstacle seem easy to overcome.

SiR and I are going to the Dominican Republic for a week in February. We'll be gone over Valentine's Day and my birthday. I'm so excited; I don't think the trip leaves my thoughts for very long. I can hardly wait to spend a week with SiR. Frolicking on the beach... enjoying the sunshine, holding hands, and just being together.

Yup... 2007 will be a memorable year!

The Holiday Season with SiR

2006-12-31T10:31:00.000-07:00

There are those that know that the two previous times SiR and I dated, we broke up between Christmas and New Years. Needless to say, this means that this time, I've been feeling particularly paranoid about this time of year. I figured that if we were to survive, we'd have to get through the holiday season - in tact.

Well, having worked in politics a million years ago, I decided to throw a "test balloon" out there earlier this month. I sent SiR an e-mail asking about whether or not he'd be interested in joining my family at my sister-in-law's Mom's house on Christmas Eve. When he didn't respond right away, I figured that this year would be a repeat of the previous ones... where we wouldn't even spend Christmas together - despite buying gifts for each other.

Then, when SiR was sick the first week of December, I drove from small town Alberta to his Mom's place (where he was staying) to offer some TLC. On that weekend, I mentioned a party at one of my BFF's place... Once again no response. I wasn't sure what to make of it, so I figured I'd just continue with my plans, and not worry about his intentions.

After SiR felt better, he gave me a call and asked about how we were going to sort through Christmas. I know... Huh? Very different from previous holiday seasons together.

We actually ended up spending Christmas Eve at his Mom's, then at his good friend's, my sister-in-law's Mom's. We exchanged gifts at his place on Christmas morning. I was so excited that he bought me cookware - including a Paderno chafing dish. And, then he handed over a box and a card. The card was sweet, and he signed it with "Love". I would have been happy with that, but when I opened the box, I realised that it wasn't what it seemed. He had put Styrofoam and nails in the box to create a rattle. But the main gift was inside a Spence Diamond bag.... It was a diamond pendant necklace. I couldn't believe it. He even picked one that was white gold - my strong favourite! I was in shock. What an amazing gift! Other than to sleep, I haven't taken it off yet.

On Christmas day, he went to his Dad's (I was also supposed to go, but we had our times mixed up), then hung out at my Mom's. And, Boxing Day (after getting in some shopping), my Mom and I went to his Mom's for dinner. (BTW, his family kept calling me his girlfriend, and knew about the necklace in advance...).

And, this Friday, we went to my BFF's place for a party... So we've spent much of the holidays together. Tonight, we'll be off to see an old friend of mine, then to the Hungarian Hall for New Years. I hope that 2007 is filled with lots more happy times and romance with SiR!

Reflections on 2006

2006-12-31T10:00:00.000-07:00

This past year has been memorable - to say the least.

2006 seems to have been a whirlwind. Someone once said that the older you are, the shorter years seem. There's wisdom in that. I can't believe how quickly time has past.

Between taking trips, working too hard, having my wisdom teeth yanked, living with someone then breaking up with him, then dating again, reaching my goal weight, then growing a bit, it's been busy.

In 2007, I'll be 37... Yipes. I'm very lucky - I have a wonderful family and friends, and the best godchildren anyone can ask for. I'm a homeowner, with a challenging and rewarding career. Still single, but having fun... Lots of fun with SiR (more on that in another blog entry).

I'm not sure what 2007 will bring... But I can tell you, it will mean a lot more work - professionally. Lots more media calls, two product launches, and a network/equipment replacement.

I'd like to say that there will be more opportunities to actually spend time with my family and friends. I'll have to make that happen.

I'd also like to spend more time enjoying life, and less time flitting about. More time in the mountains, and relaxing on beaches. Spa time... Time writing... These are things I'd like out of life.

And, I hope that SiR and I will continue to grow closer. He's been an amazing gift, and I am grateful to have the opportunity to be with him again.

Happy 2007 Everyone! All the best!

So Tired...

2006-12-30T18:48:00.000-07:00

I am so tired... I've eaten too much, and I haven't had enough sleep... I hope to go to sleep soon. Way too much stuff, not enough time.

Dad's Birthday Today

2006-12-19T19:47:00.000-07:00

Today is my Dad's birthday. He would have been 68 today.

I miss him very much. He was one of my best friends, and we shared many happy adventures together. I loved him - like I love my Mom - more than anything in the world. So, his loss continues to be a bit devastating.

Whenever something really good happens or really strange, or even everyday things, I wish he was here to share things with. He'd laugh at the silliness of things and give me me much needed perspective on things.

I was very lucky. I knew my Dad - not just as a child knows their father, but as an adult relates to other adults. We shared a special relationship, and I treasure all the times we shared.

Thanks Dad for the sign today... I appreciate you taking care of me from above.

Happy Birthday Dad! I love you and miss you!

Begining to Feel Like Christmas...

2006-12-19T19:45:00.000-07:00

There are only a few days left until Christmas, and I think I'm starting to get into the spirit of things.

Most, if not all, of my gifts have been purchased, and I've been busy wrapping. I still have a bit of baking to do... Okay a lot of baking and treat making... and my house is very messy. But things are progressing.

I can hardly wait!

Staff Christmas Party

2006-12-12T04:09:00.000-07:00

I am the best date for Christmas parties. I mingle, have fun and make my date look good. But when it comes to my own? I'm content to be a wallflower - hiding somewhere in the back.

To give you context, I don't normally go to these events. I always feel awkward and like I don't fit in. It's not that I don't fit in at work, but these social situations are intimidating. Believe it or not (and those of you who know me know this is true) - I'm actually very shy and somewhat socially retarded in these environments.

Even though I've worked for this organization for nine years, I've only been to three of the Christmas parties. Once by choice, once because a snow storm prevented me from getting back home, then this time.

My Mom and sister accompanied me, which made me feel much better. And, I guess the party was okay. The pre-party at the VP's house was lots of fun, but only thing fun about the play we attended was making fun of it.

I've attached a couple of pictures from the event. One of me and a co-worker, the other of my Mom sister and me.

Some food for thought...

2006-12-07T21:02:00.000-07:00

While working on my company’s internal newsletter, I stumbled on some quotes I thought I’d share with you.

Here are some New Year’s resolution ideas from the late advice columnist, Ann Landers:

Let this coming year be better than all the others. Vow to do some of the things you’ve always wanted to do but couldn’t find the time for.
Try to understand a point of view that is different from your own. Few things are 100 percent one way or another.
Lighten up. When you feel like blowing your top, ask yourself, “Will this matter a week from today?”

Anything I've ever done that ultimately was worthwhile initially scared me to death

- Betty Bender

The key to change is to let go of fear.

- Rosanne Cash

A man who fears suffering is already suffering from what he fears.

- Michel de Montaigne

Christmas waves a magic wand over the world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.

- Norman Vincent Peale

The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person who is doing it.

- Chinese Proverb

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

- Anonymous

Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles.

- Anonymous

An Interesting List

2006-12-05T19:24:00.000-07:00

I stole this from the Blissful Loser. I thought it was cool. I'd like to do a lot of the things on this list before I die.

If you'd like to add this to your blog, just copy, bold the things you’ve done, and post.

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried "one"/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

A Weekend with SiR

2006-12-04T18:05:00.000-07:00

I had the most amazing, spontaneous weekend with SiR.

I called home to let him, one of my best friends and my sister know that I was feeling queasy, and that I wasn't sure if I'd be heading home right away.

After I started to feel better, I decided to call home, starting with SiR, to say I was going to come home afterall. SiR said not to come home - that he was on his way to visit me in small town Alberta.

Thank goodness that I had an urge to clean my house up a bit before I went to work on Friday, so my place was not disgustingly messy.

Before he got here, I had a chance to take a bath and feel better.

We kissed passionately when he came to the door. I love his kisses!

On Saturday, we slept in until 11:30 and decided to go to Edmonton after brunch. We spent the rest of the day enjoying each other's company and being silly. We talked about the past, the present and some of the things that we've learned about dating and life since we've been apart.

He said that when we first dated, he didn't like the fact that I wasn't assertive enough. Hmm. Now I think that I might be a bit too assertive with my opinions. I think we've both changed for the better.

On the drive back to small town Alberta, we sang along to a Christmas CD I picked up at Starbucks. It was a lot of fun.

Sunday morning was a lazy morning. We made breakfast and took a nap on the couch. Unfortunately, he had to go home (he had work to do on Saturday, so he actually left about 24 hours later than he should have... oops!).

It was so sad after he left. I know I shouldn't be so silly. It's just that we had such a terrific time that I wished it could go on forever. I know... I am a child in a grown-up's body.

You know, life is short, and I'm grateful to have experienced such a happy and wonderful weekend.

When I think of SiR, I try not to think too far into the future - just the present. And, this weekend was truly a gift.

Surviving the Holiday Season

2006-12-04T17:58:00.000-07:00

"Holidays are an expensive trial of strength. The only satisfaction comes from survival."

Jonathan Miller

Christmas is certainly coming... We're only 21 days away from Christmas! Yipes! I have more of my shopping done. Steven, my brother, is definitely finished. But, I still have a bit more to go.

Although I've made my Christmas card lists, I haven't started to write any yet. I'm pretty good at the last-minute card writing, and cards generally arrive a few days after Christmas. I promise I'll try harder this year.

Of course, like every year, I have plans to bake cookies with my God-children. In fact, they planned our treats months ago. I'm looking forward to getting exhausted baking cookies and cleaning up. But afterwards, I get to be their Mom's date to her corporate Christmas party! It should be lots of fun.

Christmas Presents

2006-11-30T19:10:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it. I keep finding presents for the one person I have already finished shopping for. I picked up something - actually a couple of things - special for one of my fellow bloggers, who is ridiculously easy to shop for.

I still have to find something special for Angel, who is sitting right beside me as I type. He'll probably get clothes (wipe that scowl off your face Angel).

He just asked, "Do you drink beer?"

I said, "of course" just not the crappy stuff.

He said that's how I can get a shirt for him.

Man...

At least my sister, Mom, Godchildren, one of my best friends and her husband, and my kid brother are done... I can hardly wait to have all of it done though. I'm starting to feel broke.

I did finish knitting a scarf for my boss. I hope he likes it. It's a bit conservative, but so is he.

Of course, by Christmas all of this pre-festivity agony will be over... I hope.

Botox gone bad

2006-11-30T19:08:00.000-07:00

Not really. I just have this disgusting and painful cold sore that has made half of my lip look like botox gone wrong. How gross!

No kisses for me any time soon!

I've made a decision...

2006-11-29T19:52:00.000-07:00

Those of you who loyally read my blog may cringe at what you're about to read. Maybe it's the cold weather. Maybe it's the time of month. But I've made a decision for now... I think, although I won't say anything to SiR for now, I'd like to date him exclusively.

Okay, I know that it is risky. I know he broke my heart. I know that some of you think I'm making a tremendous mistake, but I feel comfortable and happy when I'm with him. I just feel like, for good or for bad, I need to be with him now. That I need to experience these moments with him to either get him out of my system, or discover that he's the one I want to be with longer term. I feel like I need to see this through. I need to be able to see where this goes before I can look in any other direction.

I'm loving being with him and sharing moments together. It's magic and sweet.

Is it the security of knowing him from before? I don't know. I just know that I feel safe and warm with him, and that we've both changed - for the better. It's like we're entering this with our eyes more open.

Besides, based on conversations that we've had, I think that we've each wondered what our lives would be like together, and I have to take advantage of this do-over. And, I'm having fun with it.

I'm so happy, and so excited to be experiencing this. Honestly, it's been so much fun. And, I'm glad SiR is a part of my life again.

More Cold...

2006-11-29T06:31:00.000-07:00

Brrr... It's 6:30 am, and it is minus 31 here. With wind chill - minus 43.

Grrr... quoting some fifties starlet, "It's so cold that I might have to get married."

Oh well, at least I'm awake, the heating is working and I'll be off to work early/on-time today.

I'm COLD...

2006-11-28T17:59:00.000-07:00

Fine. I really don't have any reason to complain about the cold - especially after talking with a lady from Whitehorse who said that she's looking forward to seeing the temperature in the teens... minus teens. Pretty scary.

My garage door opener is driving me, and my very pretty shoes, nuts! It refuses to open when I press the remote, so I have to manually open it. My feet are frozen, and I've been at home for about 20 minutes now.

In a strange attempt to warm up, I bought a lasagna to bake in the oven. This way, I'll have an excuse to get on my gazelle/exercise bike (i.e. I'll exercise until dinner is ready...well, I guess that would be if I could get off my computer long enough to get onto the equipment).

When is spring again?

Thank God It's Friday!

2006-11-24T16:03:00.000-07:00

What a morning! I went to bed early, so I could ensure I had enough rest for today's interview with CBC. I fell asleep okay - no surprise there - but then, of course, I kept dreaming that I was at home in Calgary (Dad was still alive), and that the alarm didn't go off, so I missed my interview. Of course, in the dream, everyone else was awake but me. And, I kept asking "Why didn’t you wake me up? You knew I had an interview at 6:20 am.". (I love these anxiety dreams).

Well, this morning, all of the alarms went off - trust me… I don't want to hear another alarm until Monday… First, my little IKEA alarm clock sounded, and I woke up okay, but decided to stay in bed a little longer, then my normal alarm went off, and I started getting ready for my day. I put on my comfort clothes - a "v" necked shirt and my favourite sweater from HR. I didn't feel rushed until I realised it was 6:12 am. So, after I spilled my tea all over the countertop, I ran and took the garbage out, then started the car to warm her up a bit.

Of course, I forgot that the cold weather means that my garage door opener doesn't work properly. So, I struggled to get the darn thing open. Then, once I drove the car out, I struggled to close it. Yipes!

Now, I knew that time was tight. So I drove cautiously through stop signs to get to work on time… Not a problem there. I arrive at work, with security card in hand, and enter my building, then the security code. It didn't indicate that the code was accepted, but the door buzzed to let me in. Sure enough. I triggered the alarm. I ran through the building to my office, called my boss and asked him to inform security. And, of course, seconds later, the CBC phoned to make sure I was available.

Thank goodness the closed door muffled the sounds of the alarm, which stopped partway through my interview. Other than my voice being a bit shaky from the incidents of the morning, the interview went well.

After the interview, I decided to turn on the lights outside my office. Yup. That simple act triggered the alarm again. I decided to be a big girl and call security myself. Insert argh here. I provided my code(s), and they provided - oh - three or four different companies. I finally asked security to help me out.

Then, I was just sitting at my desk, typing, and the alarm triggered again. Maybe I'm a jinx. Thank goodness for a couple of things. That the rest of the day went well and that it's FRIDAY!

Do I want cheese with that whine?

2006-11-23T18:19:00.000-07:00

I feel sorry for those who read my blog. My last several entries have been a bit whiny. Of course, tonight's entry is no exception to my recent trend.

I've been feeling overwhelmed with trying to keep up with things, and I'm tired. And, of course, I've been forgetful - like forgetting to take my medication this morning. Not a smart idea when my wits are required.

By about 2:00 pm, I was so tried, I just wanted to go for a walk - get out of the office. It didn't happen though. Not with our workload... Not with the weather so cold, and certainly not when I'm feeling an odd sense of wired and tired simultaneously.

Oh well, tomorrow is Friday, for which I am extremely grateful - despite the fact that I have an interview with a radio station at 6:20 am. I'll be seeing a play here in town, and perhaps - depending on weather conditions - I may head back home for the weekend.

It will be nice to just catch my breath again. Sigh.

Communication

2006-11-22T19:25:00.000-07:00

It's really been sinking in lately that communication isn't an exact science. Yes, given my background - a degree in Communications Studies - I should know this by now. I knew it, but I didn't know it.

With all of the media calls my boss and I have fielded over the last two months, I realised you can say the exact same thing - using the exact same messages - to ten different reporters, and of the ten, eight will get it right, and two will interpret what you've said in a completely different way. The same holds true when talking to friends, family, co-workers - any one you encounter on a day-to-day basis. Not sure how that happens, it just does.

Actually, I have a theory as to how that happens. Everyone has their own cognitive framework and world view. This means that whatever bias - whether positive or negative - you bring to a dialogue colours what you take away from communication. A person's bias will reinforce their preconceived notions about a topic, often without internal debate about the validity of what was said.

For example, if I believe that MSG causes headaches - which I sincerely do because of personal experience - then any research that confirms it be looked upon favourably, and any research that denies this will be seen as false. Is my opinion accurate? Not sure. Can you change my mind? Definitely not.

Such is life when you communicate.

My life is a Seinfeld episode

2006-11-14T19:59:00.000-07:00

Really... it is.

Last weekend, I decided to take a break from life, so Angel and I went to Edmonton for the weekend. The plan was to meet with my brother, Steven, who is up in Edmonton on business virtually every weekend.

Angel and I had fun - for the most part... Steven expressed concerns that Angel isn't as intellectual as the guys I normally hang out with. Sigh... It's funny to see someone through another person's eyes... suddenly all that glitters may not be gold.

Then, when Angel and I had breakfast, Steven's comments resonated in my head - especially when Angel slurped back the milk in his cereal bowl - much like a child does... Argh... I was mortified.

Other than a few enlightening moments like that one, Angel and I had a nice time, and I know he cares for me deeply.

Potentially awful weekend turns out okay

2006-11-14T19:49:00.000-07:00

After my really sniffly blog entry (thanks everyone for your support), I ended up having a quiet Saturday. I spent most of it lying in bed, doing some work, but basically veggin'. It made me feel much better to have a relaxing day.

I didn't tell anyone here in town that I was going to stay for the weekend. I just needed quiet time, and for the most part, I was successful.

But, after he realised that I was going to stay in small town Alberta, SiR came over to visit. It was wonderful to see him. We spent the weekend eating and watching movies and cuddling a bit to keep warm. It was so easy to fall into this routine. Just the two of us, laughing and joking around. So comfortable.

Now this part is going to sound pathetic... SiR accidently left his coat here. It was damp when he left Calgary, so we stuck it into the dryer after he arrived. He forgot it when he left on Monday (and of course, I didn't remind him of it...). It was nice to wear it this morning as I was getting ready to go to work. Although it didn't smell of him, there was something comforting about wearing his jacket. Okay... you can groan now.

I am grumpy...

2006-11-10T21:16:00.000-07:00

It's the long weekend, and guess where I am? I am in small town Alberta feeling GRUMPY. And why? Because I have to be hyper-responsible and get work done. Isn't that the most IDIOTIC thing you've ever read?

I feel really stupid. Other people can work their hours and walk away - guilt free. I don't. Instead I'm here at home, typing away, trying to get things done. Even though I worked about 10 hours at the office... And meanwhile my life is passing me by, and my friends will forget about me. And I will be alone and pathetic (I know... I know... Do I want cheese with that whine).

Thankfully Angel came by and brought me dinner courtesy of his Mom (who is SUPER nice). Otherwise, I might be feeling much worse. (Everything looks better on a full stomach).

I admit it. I brought it on myself. I have to be smarter. I guess.

Happy Halloween - Part 2

2006-10-31T17:52:00.000-07:00

As promised, here are pictures of the cupcakes my coworker and I worked on. I can take ZERO credit at to how beautiful and tasty these cupcakes are. I am just like the kid who "helps" a little bit. My colleague is really talented, and I'm glad she let me share in this experience.

Happy Halloween!

2006-10-31T05:53:00.000-07:00

Spooky... It is way too early in the morning, and I am awake. I made chili for our cook off, and I think my costume is planned. I even helped a co-worker decorate cupcakes (you'll see photos of those posted once I have them). VERY SCARY!

Today is going to be a bit crazy at work. I just hope I make it home in time to clean up a bit and put together some Halloween bags for the two kids that may come by my home. (Murphy's law of Halloween - the more treats you buy, the fewer kids that come by your home).

Oh, by the way, Meatloaf's new album (yes - the very use of that word dates me too much) will be released today. I can hardly wait to hear his melodic voice!

So - HAPPY HALLOWEEN everyone!

Still Sunday. Safe at Home

2006-10-29T18:43:00.000-07:00

Well, the journey back to small town Alberta - at least chunks of it - looked like the pictures I posted earlier today. It was a bit scary, and I drove about 40 km/hour for parts of the trip.

To be honest, I wasn't sure I could even leave Calgary. There was some sort of a delay on Deerfoot Trail North, so I took a side route. It took me a little while to figure out how to ensure my detour took me to the section of Deerfoot that wasn't delayed. But I did it.

The drive towards Red Deer was filled with icy and snow patches, variable visibility and drivers who didn't know what they were doing. Sigh.

Then, when I turned off towards my town, it was mostly ice and snow. I dropped my speed considerably, and it took forever to get home. Better safe than sorry I say. I guess it might be time to put my winter tires on.

Lazy Sunday

2006-10-29T11:32:00.000-07:00

Today is a lazy Sunday. I kept waking up and falling asleep, not quite certain I was ready to crawl out of bed. I burned some CDs and stared at the weather and road conditions. The roads don't look too good out there. According to the AMA website, the road conditions are poor. The good news is that the only roads that are closed are in the national park between Jasper and Banff. I guess I'll have to be cautious on the drive home.

My brother and sister-in-law are coming over to celebrate my sister's birthday. Once we're finished our lunch and cake, I'll head off before the weather declines too much.

Here are a couple of pictures taken by the AMA webcams about 10 minutes ago... Argh. I'm dreading the journey home and can hardly wait to be in the safety of my little house on the prairie.

What a week!

2006-10-26T20:08:00.000-06:00

It's been a while since I've provided a more personal update, so here I go...

I had a fun weekend. On Friday, I took my Toyota in for an oil change and the "winter package", and she (unlike her owner) had a good bill of health. There was a sale on Paderno pots and bowls at the local Home Hardware, so of course, I was like a kid in a candy store. I only bought some mixing bowls with lids. But it felt nice to get some shiny new bowls. It was fun - especially when the hardware store owner - greeted me with a smile and said he was glad to see me because I hadn't been in for a while. Such is life in small town Alberta.

Angel and I went for dinner (where he claimed that we tried out mattresses at the local furniture store - not true), played VLTs (something I've never done in Alberta - let alone a restaurant) and returned to my house where we chatted and watched South Park.

On Saturday, I tried to clean up again... something not in my nature - really. Then, one of my bestest friends of about 19 years paid a visit to my small town home. Despite recent visits (more on that later), I really don't get many friends driving the two and a half hours to see me. I was soooo happy to see Bobby. We went to another small town to this amazing little lunch cafe, which is run by a remarkable 67 year old lady and her husband. She makes a mean black bean chili that I knew Bob would love. We wandered the town streets and visited the town's main official attraction - the "world's largest lantern". After exploring the antique stores, we returned to my little house where we watched Battlestar Galactica and a few movies with Angel while munching on pizza.

Sunday morning was pretty lazy. Bobby and I woke up at around 9:00, listened to Beethoven and drank coffee from Colombia (he had brought that back from his trip at the beginning of the year). We then walked around the town, looking for an appropriate breakfast spot, and settled on the Town Pump right near my home. We ate way too much food, but it felt really good.

Then we drove out to the lake where we walked some more. When it was finally time for Bob to leave, I was a bit sad. It was good to have the luxury of seeing him again.

My melancholy quickly faded when Angel came over and helped me make soup. We watched Misery - a movie Angel is fond of - and waited for this amazing soup with lots of vegetables and Italian sausage to be cooked. I enjoyed it - not sure if Angel did. He didn't appreciate the cheese sticking to the roof of his mouth.

Monday was the start of a remarkably hectic work week. After a long day at work, Angel brought movie popcorn to my house. I played a couple of interactive SCRATCH 'N WIN tickets, and won $55. That never happens.

Tuesday was a bit more eventful. I had a massive sinus headache, and I knew I had to get better quickly. I actually left work early - 4:00ish - after about 8 hours of work. Angel had an eye appointment (he was having problems reading the subtitles in one of the films we watched on Saturday night, and decided to have his eyes checked). He was incredibly sweet and brought dinner over as well. I had such a headache, and my temperature was starting to rise - no not just because Angel was in the room. Angel went home. I went to bed early, and without a bath - something I rarely do. My sister was worried, so she called Angel and asked him to come visit and bring lemonade. Warm-hearted Angel bought me both lemonade and milk and came to take care of me. After I took my sinus meds and moaned about feeling so sick, the phone rang. I ignored it, but eyed the number with suspicion. The number appeared on my telephone again, so I decided to pick it up. It was SiR. He was in town. Okay... yes you read correctly. He was in town. Actually he was right across the street, looking for my house.

SiR and Angel seemed to get along okay. I was mortified. With my headache, my jammies, and a messy house, I was just flabbergasted. I didn't know what to do.

Angel was sweet and went home. This was twice in less than a week that a former boyfriend came to my home - unannounced - while Angel was visiting (Angel and I laugh about it now... but what an odd situation). More on SiR in the next update.

On Wednesday, I was interviewed by the Globe and Mail for a breaking news story. And, I was on the air with Dave Rutherford for about 20 minutes talking about the issue of the day. I was also interviewed by a wonderful and fair reporter from the Calgary Sun. I spoke to CTV Edmonton as well. It was a busy day that foreshadowed more to come... Today, Thursday, I talked to about 15 reporters province-wide. I figure that over the last couple of days, I've fielded 20 - 25 media calls. Something I haven't done in such a short time span for exactly a year. (Last year at this time, there was a huge number of media calls within a week which left me proud of my accomplishments). I was pleased that I handled these calls with relative ease and little panic. I was happy to come home today. It had been a very long day.

I spoke with my sister-in-law, and Angel came over again. We talked, and he is very sweet. I took an early bath, and am determined to get to sleep sometime before midnight.

More later...

Some pictures of my home

2006-10-21T10:18:00.000-06:00

I don't get many visitors here in small town Alberta, so I thought I'd share some photos of my house (especially now that it is a bit cleaner).

Here is my bedroom:

Here is the spare bedroom (also known as the Asian room):

Here is my bathroom:

Here is my dining room:

Here is a bit of my living room (and my favourite chair):

And, here is a glimpse of my kitchen:

A story to make you cry

2006-10-20T06:50:00.000-06:00

Really, I don't want to make you cry, but this is a touching story, and I thought I would share it. I don't know if it is true; it's food for thought on a cool fall Friday morning.

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning- disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: "When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?"

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. "I believe that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child."

Then he told the following story: Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, "Do you think they'll let me play?"

Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much- needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, "We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning."

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. His Father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted.

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands.

In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat. At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?

Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball. However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.

The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, "Shay, run to first! Run to first!" Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second!" Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball ... the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second- baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head.

Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home. All were screaming, "Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay" Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third! Shay, run to third!"

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, "Shay, run home! Run home!" Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

"That day", said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world".

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

Jaw-dropping moment

2006-10-19T21:05:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was an AWFUL work day. Everything I touched in the morning was WRONG (but in the afternoon, I learned that I wasn't necessarily as wrong as I thought I was). The afternoon went really well. But I was excited to go home and unwind.

As I was microwaving dinner for Angel and me, the doorbell rang. Angel opened the back door, and there stood my EX... who walked in the door. My jaw hit the floor.

My EX showed up because I had a package for him. He said he figured that I might not make it to Calgary on the weekend, and that he thought he should pick up the package personally. Yipes!

I offered the EX food, and he and Angel spoke. As they were talking, the phone rang; it was BroW. Too much. I didn't pick up the phone.

Angel left because he had other obligations, leaving me and EX alone.

It was scary. EX indicated that he believed he made a big mistake leaving and that he should move back in. I indicated NO ONE was going to live with me for the time being. He responded with "I guess I screwed up really bad then." D'uh? He was impressed that the house was so clean. I thought, maybe the house is so clean because it's house of girl now. EX kept saying that he did everything he could to NOT be a burden... Really, I thought to myself, hmmm that explains why I paid so much more for bills and boy things. This was a really awkward situation. I just kept looking at him and praying that he would leave. I overheard him talking to his Mom, saying that it didn't look like he would be staying overnight. No, d'uh. He wanted a hug before he left - I was okay with that, but then he tried to kiss me. I moved my face, so he ended up kissing my cheek. He then asked for a kiss on the lips, and I gave him a quick peck just to get rid of him. Thankfully, he didn't try anything else and left right away.

With my house to myself, I felt scared and relieved at the same time. I couldn't stop eating after he left. Ice cream. Cake. Pasta. Popcorn. Anything I could get my hands on. It was awful.

I just really felt that I should stop dating right then and there.

Thanksgiving Weekend, aka "reunion weekend" Part 2

2006-10-19T20:20:00.000-06:00

So, the last time I logged on, I was just about to explain my evening with SiR.

After I returned from Banff, I was feeling a bit grungy, so I decided to take a bath. While I was in the tub, the phone rings, and it's SiR... Early... He was ready to come over. And, I was all wet... Not good (by the way, I decided not to shave my legs...). He told my Mom that he was at the Tim Horton's near my Mom's house. Mom said I wasn't ready and asked if he could go buy her a French loaf. And he said yes... Go figure.

I was having a major wardrobe crisis. So when he walked in the door, I was still debating what to wear. He looked as beautiful as ever. And, he hugged me really tight, almost lifting me off the ground. My poor heart. I didn't know what to do.

After all the niceties, we left in his new red truck. He wanted to show me his new home, and it has such potential. He showed me all the plans, and I being a ridiculous girl wondered if I could fit into his world.

I was okay with the drive and everything, until we approached his Mom's house. Then I started to get really nervous. My nervousness didn't last long, though. His family was tremendously welcoming, and they treated me as if I had always been in their lives. We had a really fun evening, and I felt like family. In some ways, I spent more time talking with his family than with him.

We left his Mom's house fairly late, and then decided to go to Tim Horton's. We sat and chatted until 6:00 in the morning. I couldn't believe how easily we fell into old patterns. It was easy.

The ironic part of all of this is that the first time we dated, 11 years ago, we started dating on the Thanksgiving long weekend. We were at the Hungarian Dance Festival (coincidently it was in Calgary again this year), and I drove with one of my buddy's to his house. We sat around and had drinks. My friend asked why I wasn't dating SiR, and I said I didn't know. When recounted what my friend had said, SiR asked the same question, and suddenly we were dating. Our first date was Thanksgiving dinner at his sister's house... Go figure.

It was really hard to leave SiR - even at 6:00 in the morning.

Thanksgiving this year started with me getting my brother and his partner, picking up computer equipment and going to my Mom's house. Grams was over, and we had a wonderful meal (Mom makes the best turkey and stuffing).

I wasn't feeling well, but I packed my car, and started to head towards Drumheller, where I was going to meet my girlfriend from Vancouver. As I was leaving town, my body became worse, so I decided to go to emergency (I called my Mom to let her know). Thankfully my friend called, and I let her know that I wasn't going to make it.

I drove myself to the hospital, checked in then called my Mom, my boss and the department's second in command to let them know that I was in emergency, and that I likely would stay in Calgary for one more night - at least.

Then, I waited and waited to be called into emergency. I decided someone had to move my car. So, I called my sister and asked her to see if her boyfriend was in town, so he could drive my car home (I drive a stick, and the only other family member who does was in New York). My sister's boyfriend wasn't around, so I called SiR. No answer. Then I tried BroW. Thankfully he was at home and agreed to help me out.

He drove to my Mom's house first, where he told my sister that he was "in charge now." (Yipes - that went over like a lead balloon!) Then he and my Mom drove to the hospital to meet me.

They hung out with me for a while, and BroW decided to drive my car back to my Mom's. He asked if he could pick up anything for me, and I asked for a Star magazine. I know that Star is a really awful gossip magazine. But, it's one of my guilty pleasures, and when I'm feeling crappy, it makes me feel better. When he came back, he brought a few other magazines... People, Us and Scientific American Mind. Now I read Scientific American Mind, and I love it. But, number 1, I had the issue (and I told him not to buy the psychology magazines because I already had all of them), and number 2, even if I hadn't read the issue, I really just wanted to read Star. I never read Us or People - because I find them annoying. I know I sound ungrateful, but I just wanted something mindless, and BroW intentionally didn't buy Star because he didn't think it was appropriate... (Hmmm... Controlling my reading already?)

Although I appreciated my Mom and BroW being at the hospital with me, I didn't want them to compromise their work, so I asked them both to go home. Mom left me at about 9:00, and I asked BroW to leave too. He didn't. After waiting nine hours, I started to cry. And, BroW tried to comfort me, but I joked about my mascara running. He said I shouldn't wear makeup any way. Hello? I love my makeup - whether it collects dust in my drawers or not.

Sigh.

Eventually, they called my name, and I went to one of the treatment rooms. Once they hooked me up on my IV and made me comfortable, I indicated that they could call BroW. He came back to sit with me, which was kind.

When the doctor came to do the reassessment before sending me home, I didn't think BroW was that kind... He not only WAITED and listened to the doctor's assessment, he read the ER report that I was going to take to my doctor and watched me get dressed (thank goodness I was wearing my undershirt and a strapless bra, so I could do the dressing in the change room thing - where the least amount of skin would show). He then drove me home.

I felt violated. I don't share my complete medical information with anyone. It was a bit scary for me.

Tuesday was rough. I really needed migraine medication, and I had to call my pharmacist in small town Alberta to make arrangements to pick it up in Calgary. Awful...

Wednesday, I felt better, so I agreed to go for lunch with SiR. He showed me more of his house plans and took me to my tea shop. He even showed me the house where he grew up. It was really emotionally intimate.

So, now you know why I am confused.

I think BroW might be out of running for boyfriend. But, when I talked to him about my feelings, he apologized, and I felt better about him. SiR has kept in touch, but not as much as I'd like. Don't know what to do...

Thanksgiving Weekend, aka "reunion weekend"

2006-10-13T06:00:00.000-06:00

What a weekend!

The drive home was a bit stressful... The highway was filled with traffic and people who don't normally drive on the highway, so I would clench my teeth as I would slow down to 70 km and get back to my usual speed of 120 km. Despite being excited for the weekend, it was a tense drive home.

When I arrived, I was thrilled that one of my dearest friends came drove in from Vancouver to visit us. It was wonderful to catch up over Thai food. Then, in the morning we went to a gourmet food store for breakfast.... Nummy... And, we bumped into a lady I hadn't seen for months. We chatted for a while, and she gave us free pumpkin cheesecake... Gotta like that.

Then my Mom, sister and I went to Heritage Park. It was cold and a bit windy, but it was nice to wander around the park. Very few other people were there so we had an opportunity to learn things that we hadn't learned before.

We then went home and got ready for the dance festival. We got dressed and drove to the theatre. When we got there, I was so excited to see one of my bestest friends and her husband. It's amazing how easily you feel like you're at home when you see someone you love. We studied the dance steps from the front row, and enjoyed each other's company. It was a lot of fun.

Of course, throughout the evening, we kept bumping into people we hadn't seen for as much as 10 years. It was like a mini reunion.

After the performances, we went for dinner and celebrated my best friend's birthday. It was so fun just to sit, eat and catch up.

Sunday was also a bit of a whirlwind. We picked up one of my dearest friends from university and spent the day in Banff. The weather was warm, and the sun was shining. It felt great to walk along the river, stare at the mountains and inhale the fresh air.

After we returned, I got ready to see SiR... And, this is where my story ends - for the moment - because I have to get ready for work.

So many men, so confused

2006-10-02T19:05:00.000-06:00

I am in the unenviable position of having three potential suitors. What does that mean? CONFUSION. Especially for the ultimate commitment phobe. (Let's face it; if it wasn't for my fear of commitment, I would have been married years ago).

BroW is amazing. He is warm, kind, and funny. We share similar hopes and dreams. We want the same things in life, and he's willing to help me finish my laminate. He's an optimist, who sees good in everything. I could see myself falling for him because he is just so caring. He loves his family, has a steady job and makes people a priority. We talk on the phone, and everything feels right... We've even talked about marriage. About a future together.

But then, there's SiR. My heart pounds just thinking about him. Major chemistry. But he broke my heart. I haven't seen him since that cold, cruel December night. Well, not entirely true. I saw him a few times - in a store, or in a pub. And, I've run in the opposite direction. Now we speak as if no time has passed. As if the entire ugly evening vanished. It's strange. I try to remember why I was so angry at him. Why I stopped dating right after the night we broke up. Of all the men I've ever dated, he was the only one I really wanted to marry. (Did I mention I'm having dinner with him on Sunday night?)

Then, there is the Angel. That's what I'll call him - Angel. He is patient, understanding, and has a great sense of humour. I never tire of his company, and he is always there for me - even when I'm having a bad body day. I think he's beautiful - inside and out. And, he has thumbs up from my sister, Mom, one of my best friends, and - possibly most importantly, my Godson. Angel has a heart of gold... He's so cute... We joked about getting married, and then dating. Just to freak everyone we know out.

And, I am going crazy. How did I do this in my younger, more care-free days? Part of me wants to give up. Walk away from all three and start again. It might be the safest thing for me - if not them. I don't want to hurt anyone. And, the sad thing is that I am the one who will likely get hurt.

I just pray that I will make the right decisions, and right now, I am not sure how to do that.
Suggestions?

We spoke after SEVEN years!

2006-09-26T07:15:00.000-06:00

I did get a chance to speak with SiR last night. In fact, we chatted for over two hours. It was as if time had never passed. My heart was pumping through my chest last night, meaning that I found it difficult to sleep.

More later...

SiR - an update

2006-09-25T18:53:00.000-06:00

ARGH! While I was updating my blog, and letting everyone know where things are at with BroW, SiR e-mailed. My fingers are suddenly cold, and my heart is racing. I don't even know what to talk to him about. Maybe... I don't know.

More later.

Blind date guy

2006-09-25T18:16:00.000-06:00

Now that you're up to speed on the SiR situation, I thought it would be a good idea to share the news about blind date guy, whom I'll refer to as BroW.

BroW and I have been talking on the phone regularly, and our conversations are easy and fun, and it's difficult to hang up. Our chats are usually about an hour long, and filled with laughter and philosophy rather than flirtation.

Last week, after BroW and I met, we talked about future plans. When I asked him about his dream or vision for the future, he said something like (and this is paraphrased, with some details missing),"I'd like to get married and have children. Hopefully with you."

Yes... you read right... Okay, this is normally the time where I decide to bolt... I find this kind of thing overwhelming and scary, and I guess this is why I am still very single. I dismissed his comments by telling him he was sweet.

Of course, the next day, I spoke with my girlfriend who introduced us, and she said I should dismiss it... She said that it was the equivalent of a guy saying I was the most beautiful woman in the world. Whew! It made me feel better.

(By the way, I've also joked about marriage with the other guy I've been getting to know better. We joke and say that we should get married first, then contemplate dating...)

BroW and I made plans to see each other on the weekend. My sister had purchased Film Festival tickets to see the matinee showing of Manual of Love. Of course, when I spoke with BroW, who had asked what the plans for the weekend were, I indicated that he could certainly join us for the movie, but that we'd have company - specifically, my Mom, sister and her boyfriend. He was up for it... (insert moment of shock here).

The movie was funny and fabulous. I felt a bit bad for BroW - not because he was meeting my family a week after meeting me - but because I wasn't feeling great, so I was lousy company.

Although I had a headache and was finding it difficult to see, I suggested we all go out to dinner (this way, I wouldn't have to worry about the "what are you doing later tonight?" question). Well, by the time we got to the restaurant, I was feeling really sick. My head was pounding, and the drug stores in the area were closed. I asked my sister's boyfriend to pick up some Tylenol for me. To make matters worse, I started limping. BroW - or any other guy of interest for that matter - shouldn't have seen this so early on. I hate feeling vulnerable so early on.

While picking up food at the buffet, I discretely asked my sister's boyfriend if he could drive my car home. I drive a stick, and other than my kid brother, no one in my family can drive a standard.

So, after dinner, BroW offered to be of assistance too, so he put his arm around my waist and walked me to his truck. We decided that he would drive me home, while my sister's boyfriend would drive the other ladies, then BroW would drive him back to his vehicle.

BroW was very sweet. He even held my hand as he drove and inquired gently about my condition. I told him my stories about my tests and doctor's visits, and how I was grateful for my neurologist.

We arrived at my Mom's house, and he helped me in the door. He said he would phone me in the morning... Well, he didn't. I was convinced that he didn't call because he didn't want to be around someone he might have to take care of.

Regardless, I left a message on his machine thanking him for escorting me home and for taking such good care of me.

When I drove home, I was disappointed that he didn't even leave a message on my home phone - further reinforcing my feelings of being let down.

He did finally call, and he explained that he was worried about calling me in the morning, and that he thought I needed to get some rest. BroW further explained that he was out with his Dad (who requires a wheelchair) enjoying the mountains (I know... how NICE! I love the fact that he makes his family a priority).

As always, the conversation was pleasant... but I have a nagging feeling that this relationship will not go anywhere because of my health (even though I'm usually fine). He doesn't seem to be that kind of guy, but I just... I don't know. Whomever I am with - short or long term - will have to be understanding of my situation. I can't change who I am, and as much as I'd love wave a magic wand and be 100% healthy, I can't.

We'll see what fate has in store...

The Ghost of a Boyfriend Past

2006-09-25T17:49:00.000-06:00

Well, he's not really a ghost... He's still alive. But he did resurface recently - in a very strange way.

While I was out enjoying a Robert Munsch storytelling session with my Godchildren and their Mom (lots of fun BTW), my Mom and sister went shopping. As they wandered through the isles, they noticed my former boyfriend, whom I'll refer to as SiR. Before they could even think of how to react, SiR tapped my sister on her shoulder and said hello.

Then, the conversation began. He asked how they were doing and inquired about me. They said they were fine, and mentioned very little about my status - other than I was still living in small town Alberta.

SiR then indicated that he had called and e-mailed me last year, but that I hadn't responded. And, that he had considered e-mailing me again, but decided against it. Yes, he called about a year ago, but I was swamped at work. In his voicemail message, he referenced noticing me on TV, hearing my voice on the radio, and seeing my name in the paper. It was a busy time, so I didn't get back to him. I wasn't sure what to make of this phone call - we hadn't spoken in five and a half years at that point in time. (Besides with the former housemate, it could have been awkward).

When things slowed down at work, I debated calling him, but kept thinking it would be totally lame for me to call him because so much time had lapsed.

The e-mail? Well, my e-mail addresses had changed since we last spoke (both work and home), so if he did send one, it was lost in cyberspace.

Back to the dialogue with my Mom and sister... While talking with them, he indicated that he had moved into our neighbourhood - coincidently right near where my sister's boyfriend lives. So, on their way to visit my sister's boyfriend, my Mom and sister decided to check out SiR's new place... Now, the mortifying thing happened...

At the same time the mini van was on the cul de sac where SiR lives, SiR turned the corner and noticed my Mom and sister. Not only did he notice them, he waved at them (and my Mom waved back???).

Argh... suddenly the word "stalker" comes to mind.

So, I decided to call SiR in an attempt to make things better. Not sure what it did, but better might not be the word.

Thankfully, he wasn't home (or he has caller ID and wasn't picking the phone up) when I called. I tried to joke in my message to him - saying that it takes me forever to return phone calls. I know... LAME. I gave him my new e-mail addresses and asked that he call me. I guess we'll wait and see.

I cared very much for SiR, and I could have pictured us together for a long time. But the last time we saw each other, he didn't share my vision of the future, so it ended - and BADLY.

Now that almost seven years have passed, I don't know what to think or what to feel. Part of me is excited that he has resurfaced - well at least to my Mom and sister, another part of me is terrified, and yet another part of me says to stay away and let it be.

I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens.

I will keep my options open for the moment and see what evolves. You never know which dating door will be the one that magically creates new opportunities.

The meeting...and a small miracle

2006-09-17T19:34:00.000-06:00

Well, I'm shaking my head a bit. This meeting or pseudo blind date was a bit surreal.

Imagine taking all the people you dated and placing them into a blender, then taking all the good bits out to make a new person. That's what this fellow was like today. He had the good traits of the guys that I've dated. (I've been lucky to have dated extraordinary men...)

I just don't understand how the friend who introduced us was able to match us up so well. She'd never met any of the men I've ever dated. In fact, she lives in another city entirely. So I just don't know.

Regardless we had a lot of fun in Drumheller, and it was nice to get to know him better. (And for those who are interested... other than a hug hello and one goodbye, nothing happened. But I don't think I'd be ready for anything to happen just yet.)

A weird thing happened during the drive back though. As I was driving the long road back, I noticed a couple of animals crossing the road. When I got closer, I realised they were two really big dogs - one white the other black. If dogs can smile, they smiled at me. Thank goodness they crossed the road when they did, forcing me to slow down significantly. While passing them, I looked at the road ahead, noticing Bambi and company crossing the road. If the dogs hadn't slowed me down, I would have hit the deer. Small miracles again.

Love is in the air?

2006-09-17T11:40:00.000-06:00

Love is in the air for certain - at least for the couple who got married yesterday.

For me, I have to find out what's in the air - rediscover myself in the context of dating. Since I became single, I've gone out on a few dates with a really wonderful man. Today, I will be meeting another that I've been talking to on the phone for several weeks. You never know how things go and where fate will lead you.

Maybe love will be in the air; maybe not. I have to give it a shot though. Not that I'm saying that either man is a candidate just yet...and those of you who know me know that I'm quite content being single too. But you never know... Maybe one day, I too will have the glow of a happy bride - just like the one from yesterday.

More details on the wedding and my pseudo blind date to be posted later.

I lit a candle today, Monday September 11, 2006

2006-09-11T21:43:00.000-06:00

I remember Tuesday September 11, 2001 like it was yesterday. And, tears slide gently down my face.

I lit a candle today...

For those that were lost on this day five years ago
For those who continue to be lost because of the terrorist attacks, war, environmental fallout, and broken hearts
For the families, friends, loved ones, co-workers that survived
For my father who loved New York more than I ever dreamt he would and who rubbed his back against the North Tower of the World Trade Centre "for good luck." My Dad was devastated by this tragedy. He passed away three years ago.

In my heart, I carry all of these memories and all of these thoughts today. But I also carry in my heart the special gift of friendship that day - and the days shortly after - and since then.

When the World Trade Centres were hit, I was far away from home in Toronto, staying with a friend. We huddled on her couch together, crying, and hoping for miracles. I didn't know it at the time. But she is a miracle. She is a true friend whose heart is bigger than science can define. She made me feel safe, when I was away from my family, and supported me through this tragedy by creating a sense of family. She will always be a sister to me.

Attempting to smile when the body protests

2006-09-09T10:53:00.000-06:00

I usually love the freedom of living alone. I can do what I want, when I want. I enjoy my freedom and space. But this last week or so has been hard, and I remember the downside of living by myself.

As I was preparing for the long weekend, my body protested, leaving me in a state of shock. I have been so healthy. I've been exercising, having adventures and feeling strong, so when this hit me, I found it difficult - I've forgotten what it's like to not feel well. This is probably the worst its been since last November.

Friday, when it first hit, I was completely caught off-guard. I became emotional about it. I was in a combination of denial and shock. I had forgotten that I could get sick and the reality of not being well weighed heavily on me. At one point in time, these symptoms were fairly commonplace, so I took things in stride more. But now that I've lost weight, and I've been feeling so good, it came as a shock to me.

My cane had stood dusty in my living room for at least six months. It was a reminder of what was... not what is... So, using it this past week has made me feel a sense of shame - of fallibility.

I spent most of my time this week in bed - and if I wasn't in bed, I was wishing to be in bed. I don't think I was particularly effective at work. I tried to keep my spirits up and not worry, attempting to keep a smile on my face (I recently read that people who have Botox injections to rid themselves of wrinkles tend to be happier because their faces are physiologically positioned as if they are happy, so the emotions follow).

A while ago, I watched a silent film actress - perhaps Lillian Gish - who pushed the edges of her mouth up with her fingers, forcing a smile. I keep thinking about that scene - just the thought of it makes me smile.

Although I'm still in small town Alberta (I didn't want to take the risk of driving home), and I am contemplating going back to bed, I do feel better, and I am looking forward to having a more "normal" life again.

Quote of the day

2006-09-07T21:18:00.000-06:00

"Time has a way of demonstrating the most stubborn are the most intelligent."
Yevgeny Yevtushenko

I admit it... This one was "borrowed" from today's Globe and Mail. When I first read it, I thought, "yeah, this makes sense." But then I realized, it only makes sense from a positive perspective... If you are stubborn because you want to do the best you can do and be the best person you can possibly be, this quote has a lot of merit. It means that you will increase your intelligence by striving to know more - not just about the things that you are passionate about and the things you succeed at - but in the areas where you fail or simply didn't do your best.

However, there are those who are stubborn in a not so positive kind of way. Yeah... we all know these types of people. These folks are the ones who don't turn negatives into positives, but tend to use their attitude as an anchor to stop themselves from moving forward. Then... they complain about how life, or other people, limit them. Ahh... everyone's favourite type of companion - the grouchy grump.

I'd rather be in the first group - looking forward to life and the adventures that await me - because I'm too stubborn to live any other life than a life of passion and new opportunities.
Without this stubborn nature, I would crawl into the world of boredom and be "ordinary".

I am very grateful that a lot of people in my life are not ordinary; they are EXTRAORDINARY! Although I'd love to introduce you to all the exceptional people in my life, I can't. But, I do recommend that you take a look at the the three blogs I've listed under Blogs I read. These three women are remarkable in every way and an inspiration to everyone they encounter. They each bring passion, humour, honesty, compassion and a desire to experience life to everything they do. And, I am the lucky one because I know them, and one of them - I am honored to say - is one of my best and dearest friends.

My greatest wish for you - whomever you are - is that you develop a positive stubbornness in everything you do. Your life is worth it - and you are worth it. Go and find something to be passionate about, and intelligence and understanding will follow.

Being single again...

2006-09-07T21:12:00.000-06:00

Your Famous Movie Kiss is from Cruel Intentions

"I'm the only girl you can't have, and it kills you."

What Famous Movie Kiss Are You?

Stressed? These pictures may help you relax

2006-08-28T21:34:00.000-06:00

Single again...

2006-08-20T22:04:00.000-06:00

Sigh... It's official... I'm single again and looking forward to the adventure that awaits me.

Finding Romance?

2006-08-11T19:49:00.000-06:00

You'll Find Love Where You Least Expect It

You're the type most likely to find love... surprised?
You shouldn't be! You're a fun, independent woman who is always out and about.
And you're smart to sometimes leave your girlfriends behind and go it alone.
Men love to approach you when you're out by yourself - including Mr. Perfect!

Where Will You Find Love?

Whirlwind

2006-08-11T19:12:00.000-06:00

"One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries."
AA Milne

Life has been a whirlwind lately... especially now that I'm on vacation. I can't seem to keep on top of things. And, with the weather so up and down, my headaches have returned with a vengance. I have so many things to do and so many people I want to see, but my time is limited.

But the great news is that I went to Waterton with my Mom and sister for three nights this week. It's a place that I hold dear in my heart, and I consider it to be one of my homes.

Tomorrow, my Mom and I will be flying to Mexico for a week. I'm very excited and looking forward to the break.

I'll post pictures when I'm back.

Cheating with my entry

2006-06-29T23:49:00.000-06:00

I guess I'm cheating again with my entry. I periodically take these on line quizes as a lark, but this one sparked my interest, and I thought I'd add it to my blog.

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to good manners and elegance.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Oops... It's been a while since my last entry

2006-06-28T21:19:00.000-06:00

It's been over a month since I've updated this site, and so much has happened, I don't know where to begin.

Unfortunately, it is getting rather late in this hot, sweaty, central Alberta town, so I won't be able to do anything but add a short post.

I'm searching for vacation options, and I haven't had tremendous success yet. I need a time out, to be somewhere different, to catch my breath and enjoy myself.

I haven't decided where just yet, but I can say that a quiet beach would be ideal - even if it is rainy season.

I decided to check out Blog things to see if there were any good suggestions. Here's what the quiz results said. Not much help... Maybe a good travel agent will help me out more...

You Should Spend Your Summer at the Beach

You're a free spirit who is always thinking of new ways to have fun.
And you don't just love summer... you live for it.
So, you really should blow off your responsibilities and head to the beach!

Where Should You Spend Your Summer?

I've always thought that everyone can relate to the Simpsons

2006-05-24T21:28:00.000-06:00

The Simpsons... A cartoon, a commentary on society, and a lot of laughs. I always thought that I was most like Lisa, but according to this web test, it looks like I may be more like Marge.

You Are Marge Simpson

You're a devoted family member who loves unconditionally. Sometimes, though, you dream about living a wild secret life!
You will be remembered for: your good cooking and evading the police
Your life philosophy: "You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head."

href="The Simpsons Personality Test

Blessings in disguise

2006-05-19T19:35:00.000-06:00

It's always strange how fate can play an interesting role in our lives.

As I mentioned in some of my earlier blogs, I am in a lot of pain right now. I was hoping to feel better, but in some ways I think I feel worse today than I did yesterday.

It's the Victoria Day weekend, and I was determined to get home to spend some time with my family and close friends. But this pain has stopped me in my tracks.

At first, I felt sorry for myself. Then I watched the first segment of the news from my home city, and learned there was a massive pile-up on the route I normally take to get home. Had I left work to go back home, it is likely that I would have been there around the time of the accident. Feeling out of it, I'm not sure I would have been able to do what I had to do to stay safe. Me feeling yucky was a blessing in disguise. At least I'm safe and in one piece - despite my pain and related whining.

There's always a silver lining.

Grr... Still in pain

2006-05-16T19:05:00.000-06:00

It was supposed to stop by now. I was supposed to feel MUCH better by now. But I don't. I am still in pain, and HATING the side-effects of the pain medication and penicillin. I've got another appointment on Thursday, so I hope I'll be doing better by then. I'm tired of feeling like a truck has hit my mouth.

On the bright side, I did make it to work today. I spoke more in the few hours I was in the office than I did for the entire weekend. I left work early today. Not sure if I even should have been in. I'm a bit grumpy about not being able to focus and get things done. Sigh.

Better say something positive... Don't want to let this tooth thing get me too down...

"For fast-acting relief, try slowing down."

--Lily Tomlin

Good reminder that I've been busy with a million things, and that maybe - just maybe - the tooth pain is my body's way of telling me I should slow down and catch my breath.

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."

--Oscar Wilde

I guess this quote is to say - quit whining girl! The message is simple - Quit focusing on the negative and focus on the positive.

"Happiness is not funny."

--Charles M. Schulz

My teeth hurt; I feel and look like a wreck. But I guess there is humour in my situation. Yes... It's funny.

Sigh. I feel better now.

The tooth doesn't hurt, just the jaw

2006-05-12T18:02:00.000-06:00

I did it yesterday, and it wasn't too bad. My dental surgeon and the folks who work with him are great! And, they made a potentially stressful situation seem much easier. One of my wisdom teeth came out quite easily. The other one shattered a bit, so it was a lot more complicated. I slept for much of the time afterwards. I guess it's my body's way of coping with things.

Today is another story. The freezing is starting to come out, and my jaw is sore. I spent much of the day trying to rest. I feel a bit dizzy with pain, but at least the hard part is over with. At least I can enjoy ice cream. It does help dull the pain. I can hardly wait to eat "real food" again. Not that I haven't been eating. But I really want something crispy like french fries or potato chips. Oh well.

The tooth hurts, but not for long

2006-05-10T22:45:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow's the big day! I get to have my wisdom teeth removed. I hate to say it, but I'm excited about getting it done. No, I haven't lost my mind - or my extreme fear of dentists. It's just that I've been in so much pain that codeine barely dented it. So, my hope is that once the teeth are removed, the pain in my jaw will soon become a distant memory. I just want my life back.

Although I have to admit, I did take a couple steps to get my life back today. After I took a long post-work nap and some more codeine, we assembled my fire pit and the swing for the front porch.

Summer is going to be great. During the heat of lazy summer afternoons, I fully plan to read novels or type on my laptop as I swing back and forth, watching people wander by. Then in the evenings, I can hardly wait to enjoy toasted marshmallows under star lit skies in my backyard. Ah... a carefree and pain-free existence awaits...

More tooth

2006-05-08T20:22:00.001-06:00

Forgive my indulgence, but the last seven days or so have been incredibly painful. I never knew or thought that tooth pain could bring a person down so much. Now, I definitely know better.

I really wanted to go home to see my family and friends this weekend. With dizziness brought on by both pain and pain killers (isn't that crazy?), there was no way I could drive myself home safely, so I decided to stay here to try to get better.

I thought the penicillin would kick in... I thought I'd feel better. But I was wrong. 100% wrong. I spent most of Saturday in bed... and not for recreation (sigh). I slept and only left the bed to forage for food (Miss Vickie's potato chips are really not the most nutritious food - no matter how good they taste). The television was turned on, but I certainly wasn't tuned into it. I just slept, took my antibiotics and pain killers.

Optimistically, I thought Sunday would be much better. Yup. It was a bit better. I actually stayed downstairs for an hour or two and talked briefly to my Mom... My jaw hurt to talk, but I knew she was worried, so I had to call her.

Thankfully, when all this started last week, my dental surgeon's office listened to my tears and got me in about a month before my scheduled date. I went in today, a bit nervous - especially about cost - not knowing what to expect.

I sat down with the dental surgeon, who looked at the x-rays my dentist took about a month ago, and then pried my mouth open with a popsicle stick. Cost? $97. Can you believe it? For less than 10 minutes of a consultation. But, all is forgiven because he has booked me for this Thursday! Woo hooo! What a relief! I hope it goes well, and that the stories I've heard from other wisdom teeth removal survivors are true... That once the teeth are removed, I'll feel better within a day or two.

My fingers are crossed. I have to go and take more pain killers now.

My Colour

2006-05-02T21:23:00.000-06:00

I found this test, and thought it was interesting.

Your Power Color Is Indigo

At Your Highest:
You are on a fast track to success - and others believe in you.
At Your Lowest:
You require a lot of attention and praise.
In Love:
You see people as how you want them to be, not as how they are.
How You're Attractive:
You're dramatic flair makes others see you as mysterious and romantic.
Your Eternal Question:
"Does This Work Into My Future Plans?"

What's" Your Power Color?

Nothing but the tooth

2006-05-02T20:20:00.000-06:00

Ouch! My wisdom teeth have been bothering me a lot lately. I even left work early a couple days in a row. Those who know me know that I hate leaving work for illness, and I don't unless I absolutely have to.

It's been so bad lately; I just don't know what to do. I was practically crying when I called my dentist yesterday - and today. I can't take very many pain killers - actually, I'm pretty limited to Tylenol. Thankfully, I spoke to my pharmacist and my dentist's office, and through their kindness and collaboration, we were able to try another drug. It seems to help a bit, and thus far (knock on wood), I haven't experienced the nasty side effects. I'm back on antibiotics again, as they fear the infection has returned. More good news though...after some tears, my specialist appointment has now been moved up a month.

On the happy side, I had a wonderful weekend. I felt invigorated by running errands. I went to an aromatherapy shop in a trendy part of the city, and remembered how much fun I once had studying how scents affect your body. My sister and I then went shopping at Costco and IKEA - danger zones for me. I then picked up one of my best friends. Together we went to celebrate another friend's birthday.

The party was super-fun (gee, I sound like a Brady). But it was. It was wonderful to see another one of my best friends and to see folks I haven't seen in forever. One of the ladies I saw has lost about 67 pounds. I am so proud of her! She is one of my inspirations. She looked happy and glowed.

This will date me for certain, but my two best friends have each been in my life for over 20 years. Can you believe it? Absolutely amazing! They are tremendous gifts, and I can't believe how lucky I am to know them. We've gone through so much together that I feel like we're more than best friends; we're sisters of the heart. The three of us are in the picture associated with this blog entry.

Sunday had an early start, as I had to meet one of my colleages from work. She was running in a marathon, and I had all of her gear. My sister and I had the honour of spending time with her two sons and fiance. We went for breakfast at one of my favourite spots and had banana pancakes (yum!). Then we watched my friend reach one of her goals as she crossed the finish line. It wasn't an easy task. She had to run 21.5 KM in cold weather. But, she did it with a smile. I guess that's her nature.

After the race, I hooked up with another dear friend and her boyfriend for lunch. We don't see each other as often as I'd like, but whenever I see her, I always feel like I've become taller. This beautiful woman knows how to inspire and make people feel special.

Then, I went and bought a step machine. It was on sale at Canadian Tire, so I thought - what the heck. It's a nice reward. I've actually used it every day since I bought it. My theory is that if my legs hurt, I might not notice the pain in my jaw so much. Nice theory. Not entirely true.

The pain in my jaw isn't great. I can't believe how it affects my concentration and ability to think. Sigh. I hope that it feels better soon.

It was close...

2006-04-26T21:26:00.000-06:00

...but I DID IT!

I finally reached my goal weight, and now I have my star bling to prove it.

When the group leader asked me to step up and talk a little bit, I cried.

Now comes the hard part... keeping stable for the next six weeks.

So close

2006-04-26T17:26:00.000-06:00

I admit it. I study my scale. I'm on it at least once a day, trying to ascertain whether or not I am still on track with my weight loss regimen. So, I know I'm very close to reaching my official weight through Weight Watchers tonight.

My fingers are crossed that I reach my Weight Watchers' goal today. That would mean only six more weeks of paying for the program, then lifetime!

Realistically, I'm not convinced that I'll reach my goal tonight. After work when I stepped on the scale, I learned I was only about .4 or .2 pounds away. But it would be such an amazing gift to be "there."

The good news is that if I don't reach my goal this week, then it will be next week for sure.

This doesn't mean that I've lost all the weight I want to lose. Or that I'm as fit as I'd like to be. I'm just a few steps closer. No complaints though. My health has improved considerably, which is all that matters.

Stay tuned for the next post for the results of the big weigh-in.

Character

2006-04-23T10:45:00.000-06:00

"The fate of a people depends much more on their character than on their intelligence."

Gustave Le Bon

What defines your character? Here are some thoughts:

The way you treat all people - not just those you're trying to impress.

"You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.”

— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)

Character is something built over time.

"The force of character is cumulative."

— Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

"Character is simply habit long continued."

— Plutarch (47-120 A.D.)

Character is born out of experience.

"Our lives teach us who we are."

— Salman Rushdie (b. 1947)

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”

— Helen Keller (1880-1968)

You are responsible for your character.

"Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands.Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands."

- Anne Frank

"Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are to some extent a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it piece by piece—by thought, choice, courage and determination."

- John Luther

Food Hangover

2006-04-17T08:09:00.000-06:00

Ever had a food hangover? You know... you eat too much one day and wake up feeling gross 'cause of all the food you ate the day before. That's how I feel this morning. Yuck!

I guess I have to eat better the rest of the week.

Musings

2006-04-16T19:41:00.000-06:00

Happy Easter to my dear friends!

It's been a while since I've logged on, so I thought I'd share a few thoughts...

My new mascot is pictured to the left. No name for her just yet. I'll keep you posted.

On Friday, as I drove home to my Mom's place, I realised that when you compare the heaviest I was in 2005 to the lightest I've been this year it comes to a difference of 65 pounds. That's a bit of a shock. It's a lot of weight. However, given the fact that it is the Easter weekend, maybe it's more like 60 pounds lost. Wow! I'd still like to lose about 15 pounds - regardless - and focus more on the nutritional value of the foods I eat. But I'm getting to the mythical "there."

It feels GREAT to be home. I've spent time with friends and family, hung out at old haunts, and felt like myself again this weekend. So many adventures, so little time. I have a couple more people I'd like to see tomorrow, and then I'll feel like I've had a truly magical weekend. I'm so lucky to have such amazing family and friends. I am glowing at the thought of how blessed I am to be surrounded by such wonderful people.

Right now, I feel like I'm searching for a better more healthy life. I want to declutter my environment and get rid of all sorts of crap (including physical, spiritual and mental). Maybe I'm just in spring cleaning mode. I just want to do more to be more... And, I've been mapping out some ideas and approaches to improving my life. I'll keep you posted with solutions.

Have an inspired day!

A little bit of inspiration

2006-03-27T17:59:00.000-07:00

Today, I’m feeling a bit lazy about updating my Blog, so I thought I’d share a couple of inspirational quotes.

"The reason most people never reach their goals is that they don't define them, learn about them, or even seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them"

Denis Waitley

"Success on any major scale requires you to accept responsibility. In the final analysis, the one quality that all successful people have is the ability to take on responsibility."

Michael Korda

A fable about kindness…

2006-03-25T19:53:00.000-07:00

I was sent the following story from an old friend, and it touched me. I did some research to see if this story was true or not. According to several on-line sources, the story is false. It seems to have originated a book published in 1950 called Worship Programs for Juniors, by Alice A. Bays and Elizabeth Jones Oakbery, and was in a chapter entitled "The Power of Kindness.” Even though it’s an urban myth, this “fable” of kindness is still worth sharing.

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while
trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from
a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.

There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and
struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could
have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse
surroundings an elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced
himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.

"I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life."

"No, I can't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied
waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door
of the family hovel.

"Is that your son?" the nobleman asked.

"Yes," the farmer replied proudly.

"I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own
son will enjoy. If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow
to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did.

Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated
from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become
known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the
discoverer of Penicillin.

Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was
stricken with pneumonia.

What saved his life this time? Penicillin.

The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill. His son's name?

Sir Winston Churchill.

Someone once said: What goes around comes around.

Nothing is predestined...

2006-03-20T17:54:00.000-07:00

Nothing is predestined: The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.

Ralph Blum

Today's quote is a reminder that part of the ebb and flow of success is to face up to the challenges that are posed to us daily.

Is it easy? No. But nothing in life that's worthwhile is. You'll make mistakes, experience challenges that make you ask if you're doing the right thing, and shake your head as obstacles are thrown at you. There will be people who challenge your thoughts, question your actions and try to distract you from achieving your goals.

In light of all the hurdles, it’s almost a wonder how anyone can achieve anything. But what can you do to reach your goals? Keep moving forward. Have a strong vision. You might not succeed right away. The more you keep your eyes on your goals, the more likely you are to achieve them.

Lately, I’ve been thinking of pioneers in their respective fields – those who stood their ground although others opposed them. They made their mark and changed our lives for the better.

Our challenge in life is to make our own mark, excel at what we chose to do with our lives and make the world a happier place.

Genie in a bottle

2006-03-13T19:01:00.000-07:00

"When you have a dream you've got to grab it and never let go."

Carol Burnett

Dreams are tremendously important. If you want your dreams to come true, or if you want magic in your life, you need to make it happen. You are responsible for your own luck and your own fortune. Take ownership of your life - this means all the positive and all the negative experiences - and you will be able to create the future you want - rather than allowing outside influences define who you are.

Hold on to your dreams - they are a reflection of who you are - and you will be able to live them.

The Muppet Quiz

2006-03-10T07:31:00.000-07:00

Not sure if I passed or failed, but here it is...

You Are Gonzo the Great

"Is something burning in here? Oh, it's just me."You're a total nutball who will do anything for attention.The first to take a dare, you'll pull almost any stunt.You're one weird looking creature, but your chickens don't mind!

The'>http://www.blogthings.com/themuppetpersonalitytest/">The Muppet Personality Test

Positive v.s. Negative

2006-03-09T21:52:00.000-07:00

"Pay no attention to what the critics say; no statue has ever been erected to a critic."

Jean Sibelius

Of the many lessons I’ve been learning lately, one that resonates a lot is regarding negativity. I’ve found that positive people tend to take positive action and seek the good in everything, while negative people seem to try to find the bad.

I’d hate to be one of the people who chooses to live in the shadows, and I really have problems understanding why someone would choose – through their actions or thoughts – to be unhappy. Sure… sometimes circumstances frustrate us, take us into directions we don’t want to go, and make us unhappy. Everyone faces adversity. But we can choose to find ways over overcoming them.

There’s a quote attributed to Abraham Lincoln that says that “A man is about as happy as he makes his mind up to be.”

Interestingly enough, I’ve discovered that those who are positive tend to take responsibility for their actions – whether these actions be positive or negative, and those who are more negative tend to accept credit when it isn’t necessarily warranted and assign blame. I guess it’s the difference between being proactive or reactive in your life.

I find it very difficult to understand this “take no responsibility/blame others” and “everyone is against me” attitude. I always think that if I make a mistake, I have to look for ways to fix it or do it better next time. It allows for growth. Those who spend so much time looking for faults in others – or finding others to blame for their shortcomings – never have an opportunity to grow.

My theory is that if you don’t continue to learn and seek learning experiences in life, your mind and your soul will slowly die. (Based on some of the research I’ve recently discovered, there may be some scientific truth to your brain’s capacity to develop if you are in negative situations – but that’s another blog entry). I just want to grow, evolve, and develop.

Having lost too many people who were too young to leave us, I know life is too short to be caught up in the negativity. Live for the now. And be happy. That’s my wish for you.

Building Castles

2006-03-08T20:26:00.000-07:00

"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them."

Henry David Thoreau

Not a bad thought for the day... It's important to dream. Actually, it is vital to life. Without dreams, you have no goals to work towards - no sense of direction to where you should be going. However, once you have the vision, it will continue to be just a dream until you make it come true. You have to work towards what you want because wishful thinking doesn't make things happen. You have to make things happen. It's as simple as that.

Think about it. Do you remember being a kid wanting to learn how to ride a two-wheel bike? First, you saw the other kids - maybe a brother or sister or cousin - whizzing around on their bikes and thought you wanted to do it too.

Did you learn from just wishing? No. You learned by watching at first. But watching wasn't enough. You had to put your thoughts into action.

At first, you may have had a bike with training wheels, or maybe your Mom or Dad held the back of your bike as you anxiously tried to pedal and not fall down. Fear of falling was quickly overcome with a combination of encouragement, the adrenaline of learning something new, and the desire to become more independent. Sure you may have fallen down. (In my case, I remember my Mom and Dad teasing me... I never fell off my bike when I was learning. I always jumped off before I could get hurt.) Every time you fell (or in my case - jumped off), you would get back on. Sometimes it was right away, other times it took a little while longer to work up the courage. It didn't feel like a question of courage. It felt like a question of desire. Eventually, you were able to ride your bike.

As the days and months passed, you were able to evolve from cycling on the sidewalk to cycling on the street or park pathways or where ever you wanted to go. You just did it.

Cycling is something we take for granted. It doesn't seem hard now. But then... it seemed to be the most amazing thing in the world.

Riding a bike and building a castle are very much the same.

So, build your castles. Get lost in the imagery. Be in the castle. Then bring it to life. Take the baby steps, set reachable milestones, and keep the castle in your mind until it becomes a reality.

Bad Body Days...

2006-03-07T18:15:00.000-07:00

I occasionally suffer from "bad body days." No. It's not what you think. Everyone has fat days or bad hair days. But that's not what this is. A bad body day is when you just don't feel well and can't do much other than rest. It's like your body has just given up on you for the day, and you realise the things you take for granted - like walking properly and having the strength to do every day things.

I've had this condition on and off for years, and I've been able to combat it for the most part - partially through medication and partially through taking better care of myself. But it occasionally creeps back, creating a mixed bag of emotions: I know I'll feel better v.s. I hate feeling ill; I know that there isn't much I can do other than take a time out v.s. hit panic mode 'cause I can't do stuff and I feel like I'm missing out on life; I can handle it v.s. woe is me.

Thankfully, I've experienced this enough to know that things will get better - they always do - I just need to be patient. Although the last few days have been a challenge, I've experienced much worse, and now I feel like I'm on a bit of an upswing. (Geez... so much for having an excuse to avoid laundry and house-cleaning).

I am grateful that despite the challenges I face, I have wonderful supportive family and friends who help me out, and that other than a few specialist appointments, I've been able to work. These are great gifts that I don't take for granted.